A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:He started communicating with his old girlfriend through email 7yrs after we got married. And it lasted for four years. They never got to see each other though because she was in another country. He said they never had closure so he just tried to close it. It was open in the beginning as casual friendship but i noticed he would get so happy and excited talking to her and he wouldn't b so happy with me, so I called her once and told her not talk to him anymore as i cant see him more happier with her rather than me, but they continued and he never had plans of telling me these, until I discovered it myself once when he forgot to sign out his email. After their four years of email communication, he got so involved with her tht i complained to her husband and it was a big fuss. i did find out that she stopped but my husband pursued her and wouldn't let her be, she tried to shut him off but he kept calling her and sending her mails apologizing and convincing her. They were again back and this time her husband divorced her.But now I am so bothered.I feel so down, so stupid. She did tell him to leave her alone again but he still wants her. what shall i do? i cant leave him as we have 4 kids and I have no family, and she lost her marriage becoz of my husband. whose fault is here? Her's, mine or my husband and who is suffering now? just her or all 3 of us? and I am so worried what will my husband do now? I am sure he wont leave her now that she is divorced and single. Pls advise.
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (6 November 2007): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks everyone. I still don't know how to handle this situation. But I am going to have a serious talk with him or her. its her or me this time!
A
female
reader, eyeswideopen  +, writes (5 November 2007):
 Ultimatums usually have a way of coming back and biting you in the butt however I think it's time you tell your husband to knock off this nonsense or you will throw him out. He is totally out of line with this behavior. Be prepared for the worst but I don't see how you can put up with this. Emotional cheating is just as destructive to a marriage as physical cheating. Tell him it is all or nothing, either way I think you'll be better off than you are right now.
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