A
female
age
51-59,
*ensey
writes:Hi there, I have been with my current hubby for 10 years and have a 10 year old son together. During this time he was emotionally and verbally abusive to myself and my other 4 children. 7 months ago I made him leave. During this time he sought help for alcoholism and bi-polar. He has been sober since and is on medication. While I was lonely and vulnerable I turned to a friend and became intimate with him. He is warm and caring and does not judge my kids. He is going through is own issues, (divorce, bankruptcy) but loves me dearly. My husband wants to work on our marriage, but I am scared of his old habits. Financially he can provide for me. How do I know if I am making a mistake or not?
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, DoubleM  +, writes (20 July 2010):
 How can anyone here know? All I would offer is that your husband may or may not relapse into his old ways, but men tend not to change long-term. If ever abusive, and he was as you relate, then that trait is likely to fester.
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