A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:My husband and I have been together since we were both 20 years old. I told him from the beginning that I don't care where we live as long as we get married near my hometown. He grew up in rural farm-town America and now that's where we and our kids live because he wanted our kids to grow up the way he did. (I grew up in suburban Chicago.)We got married when we were 23 and had our first kid (a boy) when we were 25. We had our second kid when we were 28 (another boy) and our third and fourth (fraternal twin boy and girl) when we were 31. Now we're 35 and I'm eight months pregnant with our fifth child (another boy).The reason for this post is because my husband wants two more kids. It's not like we couldn't afford it seeing as I'm a nurse in the Pediatric unit at my hospital and my husband is an engineer/part-time farmer but two more kids? I've always had an inkling that I would have a large family but seven kids in total? Is that insanity or an acceptable number?When we were in the dating phase all the way up to when I was pregnant with our oldest, we always joked about having 7-10 kids but I never thought my husband was being serious about it! Oddly enough, the passion between my husband and I has not faltered one bit since we started dating. We still find time (although very limited) to have sex regularly. I understand it's a personal choice whether or not to have a large family but I'd like some input as to what others think.I'd prefer advice from people who have three or more children, though. How does your (larger than average) family function? Is the passion between you and your spouse still the same as it was before your oldest was born? Would you consider having more children if you only have three or four? Thanks for any advice! Reply to this Question
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (15 May 2011): My mum dad had four kids. I say five is more than enough! it does not matter about money, the most important thing is the attention the children will get. With 6,7 kids their will be competiton coming from them and I bet some of them will have issues coming from such a big family and feeling ignored.
A
male
reader, Philips  +, writes (15 May 2011):
 I really really really want to have over 10 kids when i get married.
However its impossible for me, because i will not have enough time to take care of the kids, plus it would be a big financial burden for me.
If the situation was different i would do it.
I guess that's another dream that will never be fulfilled.
If you can afford all those kids, then why not try it, life seems to have been good to you...
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A
female
reader, Honeypie +, writes (15 May 2011):
 I have 3 kids and that is my absolute max! LOL We planned for 1 child (since my husband have kids from a previous marriage) but ended up with 3. I have no regrets having 3.
If you two can make the marriage, life, day-today work well for you and the kids, I don't think the number makes a difference. Honestly I hear that after having 3, it's not a big deal to add more. If you can handle 5.. you can handle 7. However. I think realisticly (from my point of view) that 7-10 is "overkill" - I do spend a lot of time with my 3 kids together and individually. They all thrive at home and in school/sports. I feel like I have time for them all. If I had 7.. I think I would just feel exhausted.
Then there is the whole age thing.. As a nurse, you know all the "dangers" of having kids after 35. Chromosomal abnormalities and so forth. ( I had my 3rd at 35)
Again though, if the two of you think you can handle it.. I don't see the problem. :) I just know.. it's not for me.
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A
male
reader, Problem.helper +, writes (14 May 2011):
 I m sorry, I dont really have any kids but to me it seems like 5 kids is enough. How will you get money for collage and other stuff?
I guess you are financialy well off now but things can change and having teenagery is much more expensive than having almost all children children under 10 year old.
And I dont think its good to have more than 4-5 kids because I am one of 6 and I have always crawed attention from my dad and he never had time just for me since I have 3 more brothers with 1 to 7 year difference.
If you don't want any more kids you should tell him that.
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