A
female
age
,
anonymous
writes:My husband of 32 years is having an emotional affair with his admin. We have 3 kids who all grown. We married when we were very young. The oldest is 32. We stayed together and raised our kids and have a good life. He is a shop supervisor and I am a teacher. His affair began with just flirting. Now he calls her honey and sends her flowers and candy and sext messages. I am very upset and confused and depressed. I plan on going to my Dr to get meds and referral for counseling. Do I need a lawyer as well to protect myself?(lord how expensive are lawyers?) I haven’t confronted him yet. But I feel there is only one way this will end up. It is hard throwing away 32 years of your life. He is very vindictive his favorite saying is if you mess with the bull you will get the horns. We have accumulated a lot over the years and he is very possessive he feels it is his not ours.We are both not happy. We are so different. (We argued the other night..some ad about car insurance and he said you have to pay a deductible when someone else hits and they are at fault and I said no that’s not true. He was so pissed he went to bed in a huff because I would not agree with him. Did I mention he is a control freak? I like to go out and visit family and friends. I can’t even invite my relatives over for holidays because It would make him mad. We never go out together. He never has anything nice to say to me but he lets me know how useless I am. He constantly makes inappropriate comments to and about other women. Did I mention he flirts with the sales reps that come in? He was with one for 2 hours one time just talking about this and that some of it not appropriate for the work place. One would sit with her legs open in front of him and he encouraged this behavior. He is infatuated with one of the rep that lives in portland and comments how good looking she is and how impressed he is with her.As I said I am very depressed and confused. He is a married man. Flirting and having the hots for other women is hurtful to me and our marriage.Do I kick him out and tell him to get lost and good riddance?
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (25 April 2009): I'd say the answer to your question is undoubtedly 'Yes'.
I don't know what system the lawyers use over the other side of the pond, but if it was here in the UK he could well end up paying for both sets, and if he thinks he'll walk away with all 'his' posessions he can sure as hell think again. In this case you'll be the Bull!
I look forward to hearing replies from American divorcees on this one!
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