A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:I have been married to my 2nd husband for 7 years. He is a good guy and loves my daughter (from 1st marriage) as his own child - even calls her his daughter and she calls him Dad. For all of his good qualities (he's faithful, no drinking/drugs, has a job, etc.) the couple of bad qualities he has are driving me mad! For starters, he makes me feel invisible. I've asked him what his idea of paying attention to me consists of and he thinks that asking me how my day was and occasionally cooking dinner is more than adequate. He NEVER plans a date out for just the two of us - EVER. Despite me telling him how much it would mean to me if he did. Further, I've said it doesn't have to be fancy - just put together some time for just the two of us. But he always has some excuse on why he can't or won't. It really feels like the more time that passes, the more hurt my feelings get; which in turn the more obstinate he is to the idea. He digs his heels in that he does a lot of stuff that I don't appreciate, so why should he plan a date. The stuff he does though, are things that he would do anyway whether it was for me or not. (i.e. load the dishwasher, fold towels, take child to school, etc.) Oh, and on a sidenote, when we were dating he was Mr. Romance... he said he liked spoiling me because I was not like his other gold digging ex's. I don't need or ask for anything but his attention but he insisted on fancy dinners, dancing, jewelry, flowers, vacations, etc. The minute we got married it all stopped. Even his radio stations changed from smooth jazz to AM sports talk radio. I feel like it was bait and switch.I'm miserable. I don't ask ANYTHING from him other than to please just show me once that I'm worth a little effort. I love this HATE HATE HATE feeling unworthy. Any insight/suggestions y'all have would be totally appreciated. Thanks.
View related questions:
flowers Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (3 January 2011): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionJust caught my typo in last paragraph. 3rd sentence should've said "I love him but HATE HATE HATE feeling unworthy."
|
