A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes: hi everyone im a 33 year old wife and happy with my husband but sometimes he can be acting a little overprotected. i was just wondering if u guys can help on wether or not go to a trip with my sister and her family with my kids. i asked my husband but he doenst want me to go he told me that if i left to never come back. I never go out to trips like this,its gonna be my opportunity to see some of my family ive never seen in years. i dnt want to lose my husband but i think his being a little to selfish with me? what should i do?? Reply to this Question Share |
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female
reader, PhillyPeaches +, writes (30 June 2007):
Either you arent telling us everything or your husband is RIDONCULOUS!!!!!! He said if you go on a trip with your sister and your kids to see some family then you shouldnt come back? like is he serious right now? Are you going to Vegas? or putting your kids up for auction? frankly i think it wouldnt be the worst thing for you to go on this trip... and never look back
A
male
reader, eddie +, writes (30 June 2007):
You have to give more background information. I don't believe the word "overprotective" is accurate. The word should probably be controlling.
Who and what is he really protecting? I imagine the only person he's protecting is himself. He's possibly protecting his own insecurities by eliminating any room for you to act inappropriately. So he protects his inappropriate beliefs by controlling the variables. You're a variable in this case.
As an example, not to be taken personally, we control are dogs by becoming the master. We keep them on leashes, making the leash shorter when needed. That is what's happening to you. He wants to dominate your options and protect his misguided actions by control.
Unless you've given him reason to doubt your integrity, or there is other information we haven't got, he's wrong.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (30 June 2007): Obviously there's a problem you two need to discuss and work out if the only way to trust the wife is forbid her to go places. Don't tell us you're not allowed to go out with friends without his permission either. How far did it go? Have you invited your husband to join the trip? Why doesn't he like the idea of it? If it's only overprotection he should be worried about the road for ex, but I sense there are trust issues in the middle and isn't fair to make you choose between going to see your relatives and your marriage. Have you given him reasons not to trust you before? Tell us more, what other restrictions does he impose and how's the relationship on the whole?
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