A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:Hello Dear Friends,Let me tell you a little bit of my situation. In the month of June I got married to a military (USAF) I am Mexican and he is American, in the month of August he was deployed to Korea, I came back to Mexico were I was living before I married him, I had a job and a life here, but suddenly everything changed, I lost my job, my car broke down 2 months ago, I got sick, my mom also lost half of her income, etc. so as can you see I am in a difficult situation. I have told all this to my husband and all I have heard so far is “oh! Im sorry, baby!" "I would like to be there to help you out"... or "I hope things get better soon". He haven’t sent me a single nickel!! For good or for bad I am too “pride” I just can not ask him for money!!! What do you think is on his mind? American are like that? In our Hispanic culture the man is the one with the biggest responsibility. Plus, I have heard that when a military gets married, his salary is arise a little bit, but he says that being in Korea gets less money because he doesn’t get the extra money for housing and meals he gets living in the US.I am really confused about this situation, I really need his economical support! It is supposed I am a married woman but living on her parents expenses.He swears he loves me with all his heart, that I am the most important person in his life, but… I don’t feel he really cares about me.Please, share with me your thoughts about this… you might bring light to my confusion.
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male
reader, daletom  +, writes (18 January 2008):
(Former USAF here, 1975-81.) What your husband is saying is not accurate and he should know better!
If you are legally married your husband has an obligation to assist with your support and the military services recognize this. Your husband should have reported your marriage to the Personnel system, and you should have a "Military Dependent's ID Card". If not - he is potentially in trouble, especially if you are not an American citizen.
You need to contact the the AF. I can't give you specific details since my association with the USAF ended long ago. I would try the Military Personnel Office at his last permanent duty station. They may have something similar to an "Office of Family Affairs" to assist you. The next best options would be the Chaplain's office, then the U.S.O., and possibly the American Red Cross.
I hope that not many American men are like your husband, though I know a few are - both in and out of uniform. American military members are not highly paid - they will never get rich on military pay - but they are adequately paid to support a family. Your husband has a moral obligation to do so.
Integrity first - service before self - excellence in all things. (See [ http://www.usafa.af.mil/core-value/ ] for more info.)
A
reader, anonymous, writes (18 January 2008): Hi Hunny,
Dont worry and I dont agree with the last post listen to what all the other aunts have said that is good unserstanding advise I understand your possition and this must be a big strain on you so good luck hunny LOTS OF LOVE AND HUGS MANDY xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
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A
female
reader, soldierred +, writes (26 December 2007):
 Your husband does get extra money for being married in the military. And especially because he is over seas. He get all kinds of benefits. I honestly would tell him you need his help, and maybe just make it a general help and he will get the picture. Now if talking to him does not work you can get his chain of command involved and they will make him give you something.
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A
male
reader, rcn +, writes (8 December 2007):
 My advise to you is to contact the USAF. American military requires support to the spouse. They'd take a portion and send it directly to you.
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