A
female
age
41-50,
*inachand
writes:Dear ppl, I need help here,bI’m 30 and my husband is 40 years of age and we both have one boy 12, and girl 6, every since my daughter 2nd birthday I saw his changes he doesn’t share happiness , sadness or any other things bothering him that’s goes on him. so I decided let him go on the trip to Cuba for vacation 2007 . I thought may be he needed a vacation for him self alone, but didn’t make any different . he came back with and new stuff like taking financial stuff from me and Jealousness on me but he try to show for others he try to talk normal and act normal front of other’s. When we have arguments he goes sleep down on the sofa, I’m not used to sleep alone, most of the night I left of with tears . he doesn’t care If I Cry or If I’m worried. Lots of time I spoke to him about our problem and I told him we need to fixed, and we need to work on the problem so we can run our life smoothly, he does listen at the time been but late in 2-3 weeks his back again. for little things his not working out in between us so I decided to get a council but de didn’t wanna come he told me in backhome we don’t have counseling.... but I went..... still is not working out for example last Saturday night we went to pickup a mattress from his sister house for our son besets we only need the top piece of mattress but he loaded the bottom piece too at the time I told him we don’t need the bottom piece, why r u loading, didn’t listen to me, we end up putting kids car seat in the drunk and we suppose go to shopping for kids . we couldn’t do it because the van full of mattress piece while on the way I told him why did you load the bottom piece, we don’t need it he answered me Oh lets take if we don’t need we’ll through it . I told him is double the work, at the time he didn’t answer me normal , and I told him we’ll just go home we don’t need to do shopping because the kids are without car seat belt and I don’t wanna take a change, (he pulled into a mall) this morning I told you that I wanna go shopping with you and the kids, you know that to now your telling us do the shopping and you wanna stay in the car. No I don’t wanna do the shopping will just go home, that second he got of the car he start walking from that place to home it takes half hour of driving usually from that place but he wanna to walk . he got out and start walking at 7:30 pm and came home 10:30 . I been asking him to get in the car, he wouldn’t he ignored and I told my son to go get him my son wend and told him couple times to come back we can’t just looking for you in the street . get told my son leave me alone and he sound it like get lost, my son came back cry saying dad sounded like get lost. me and my son decided we’re going home let him deal with his problem and let him com home by walking, when he came home I act it like normal. Why his doing this: *Don’t like me and my marriage *stress out with anger problem *Depress *He seem’s like confused and don’t know how to deal with problem even with kids or me his not socializing that much like sharing love spending times I don’t hardly see him smiling with me or my kids. but I saw with he’s friends he talk to them for hours and hours while his drinking alcohol and his family to.
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (9 November 2009): Your husband sounds like he is definately unhappy. His mind is elsewhere.
You need to get him to communicate with you about what he's thinking. You need to prepare yourself for anything and tell him that whatever the problem is, you need to know about it.
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