A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:ive been married for two years and with my husband for almost 6 years all together.. i love him . but all we do is fight. the sex life is terrible and we have good days were we are happy but most of the time we are miserable.. should we call it quits and just be friends or try in work.. weve tried cousaling .. it just seems like wen we are just friends we get along way better and can spend all the time in the world together but wen we are doing stuff as a couple we fight.. wat should i do. ?
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reader, anonymous, writes (20 November 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank you soo much for all the advice. I want us to work so bad and no we dont have kids. Its both of us who start fights.. Im starting to realise somthings that make him upset just as he is starting to see my side.. hopfully we can talk this threw and work this out beacause ive nva been with out him and i dont want to be.. i want to be with him .. today he came home with flowers and set up a date and a movie it was soo sweet and somthing we needed we dont get to do much since his army carrer and my carrer .. we will see how things start to go but i have a good feeling about it.! thank you guys so much for the help!
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (19 November 2009): There's just not enough information to help you... Two years isn't very long to walk out of a marriage... Two years isn't very long for you to be fighting already. You two should still be on honeymoon.Why are you fighting, what is it that upset you, or gets him angry. First, figure out why your fighting and if you can fix it. Your no longer kids, your married, and grown up now. You've known each other for years, you know what he likes, he knows what makes you upset, you should be each other's best friend.Why is the sex bad? Whose fault is that? Is it too fast, too rough, there's lots of help on this website to help you improve your sex life together. Seems there's a few things to try before you both run away. Can you go and stay at your parent's house for a week or so, and really have a deep think about your marriage. What goes wrong and why. Think about why you married him, and what you thought marriage would be like. Think about what a divorce would mean, and what it would be like to be with someone else, and know that he's loving other women. All this needs to be done, before you walk away and cancel your wedding vows.
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reader, anonymous, writes (18 November 2009): try seperating for a while.... a break with no contacting each other for some time. Sounds like my past relationship except I was not married. The only way we could talk was if we became friends, then we would get back together and It would all start again! Are you complaining about anything? Is there anything you mention to him that bothers you about your relationship with him?? And who starts the fighting? it all depends on the factors. If it's you who starts then I suggest you stop because your hurting him. And you will end up losing him like I lost my bf. If he starts, then don't argue back....just listen to what he has to say without speaking over him. How long have you been trying to fix this problem??? I suggest that you discontinue the relationship if nothing seems to be working. Truth is that something is wrong there and if it's been continuing to be an issue, there is no way to fix something that's broken. Stay friends if you can't work it out. Or just move on and don't be friends, just forget about him.
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reader, anonymous, writes (18 November 2009): i think you got married too young if your age is infact your real age. i know divorce can be tricky but if you are both on the same page about this, you should talk about divorcing and taking some time for yourselves, to get your individual lives started. good luck!
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reader, anonymous, writes (18 November 2009): You are terribly young to have been with this same person for 6 years. Relationships started at this young age have a low survival rate..because you are two very different people then you were 6 years ago, and you will continue to change quite a bit in the next 5 years or so.
If you have worked on the marriage with counseling and nothing is working, and you are not leaving the marriage out of anger then it may be time to call it quits....I am hoping that children are not involved, if not even more reason to call it quits and make a fresh start.
Really try not to be in a relationship at all for the next couple of years, you have never had a chance to be on your own and that is bad for your personal development.
Let us know how you get on or what you decide to do.
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