A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:hay guys! ive been going out with this lovely guy for 1 yr! hes perfect for me! now hes just gone away with the army! missing him but everythings fine with us its just his mum! she hates me... she keeps lieing to him and telling him ppl have told her ive been cheeting and how i use him for his money which is not true as i earn more then him! then recently i wrote him a lovely letter before he went away and he left it at home (his mums house) and she read it and showed it to some one whom was mentioned in the letter! i dont know what to do shes making my life so hard with him, we argue all the time as she sticks her nose in and we end up arguing, hes moving out and in with me when he gets bk just to get away from her but now shes saying more stuff and i think im loosing him. should i just give up now? ive tryed everything to be nice to her choc flowers etc u name it ive done it. as she mean so much to him help plz
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female
reader, Jovial  +, writes (10 April 2007):
 hi
leave momma's baby alone, he is making excuses because i think he likes momma's choice, dont let yourself to be treated like an after thought. its hard but move on and find someone more mature like yourself.
Jovial
A
female
reader, Jovial +, writes (10 April 2007):
hi
leave momma's baby alone, he is making excuses because i think he likes momma's choice, dont let yourself to be treated like an after thought. its hard but move on and find someone more mature like yourself.
Jovial
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (8 April 2007): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionok well now things have got worse with her shes got so bad shes picked another women for him whom she thinks will be better! now he is unsure weather we should move in together! he emailed me last night saying theres no point if he can only be with me 2 days a week as he works weeks n gets weekend off! but now he dont wanna move in!!!
i dont no what to do i dont wanna loose him but i am arnt i?
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A
female
reader, Jovial +, writes (27 February 2007):
hi there
im so glad things turn out this way. you are very lucky to get a man who can standup to his mother. congratulations!!!!!!!!
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (26 February 2007): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionhay guys! have not told him yet as dont wanna do it while hes away.. but the other night he called me and asked me how my flat search was going, as im moving homes! he said to me he thinks we should get a house so no matter what i win now as he'll be living with me and she cant say anything as he asked me! whhhhhooooowwww thankyou for all your replys!
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (22 February 2007): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionhay thanks for your advice im seeing him in a month, so gonna tell him then what shes been like as he does not know all this as he is away right now! so im gonna tell him what shes done since he has left and told him i tryed and tell him that if he wants to be with me then i want nothing to so with her untill she learns to respect me and my relationship with her son! thanks again guys lets just hope it has a happy ending! (dont think its going to though, we was planning on getting engaged soon too!)
thank you x
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A
female
reader, Jovial +, writes (22 February 2007):
hi
I think you are faced with the “mother-in-law from hell” syndrome, and with this kind you cant win. What you need to do is to live your life as you see it fit, you don’t have to feel like you need to win because you are not in a competition. You are his gf and she is the mother and that makes a lot of difference. Unfortunately if he is mama’s boy you will eventually loose him no matter how hard you try you will never be good for her precious son. Until he can stand-up to her and tell her to stop lying about or discuss your relationship with him she will never stop and when u tell him what she is doing to you guys, soon or later you will turn to be the bad guy.
You might have to consider the possibility of a break-up if this is the fact, because wherever you will be with him she will be there it might not be physically as that is what is happening now she is not physically there but emotionally she is there, the fact that she can open his letters means she controls him and he bend over all the time otherwise he was gonna be firm with her and demand respect for both of you instead he had started believing her.
Do you think this the man you want to be with? Do you want a man who is always living behind her mother’s shadow? Remember that the problems you are experiencing right now they multiply whenever you start staying together. And also the fact that you have started comparing who earns more or less and who can use who this shows the strong effect this woman has in this relationship, if u guys don’t see what she is doing to keep you apart you are playing right into her evil wish. You can’t keep fighting her alone, you need his hand. If you want this to work stop fighting her, buying her gift and pretend you see nothing this might be the greatest weapon you were looking. Buying her gifts makes her feel like she is the boss so don’t let her deceive herself any further.
jovial
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A
female
reader, AskEve +, writes (22 February 2007):
 Why is she being so horrible? What have you done to make her feel this way? If you have always just been nice to her then she must be jealous that you are getting her son's attention and she isn't. For some mothers, no one is good enough for their children.
Let your boyfriend know you've tried everything to win her over to no avail. Let him know you love him very much and would never do anything to jeopardise your relationship together so that anything he hears from his mum is only to try and break you both up. He'll be home soon and see for himself how she's acting towards you. What you DON'T want to do is ridicule her, call her names or pull her down in front of him as he'll only stick up for her and this will make YOU look the bad one so don't fall into that trap.
Eve
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