A
female
age
36-40,
*dam0161
writes:Hello, Id really like some advise/opinions from other people.I have been with my gf for 7 months, she is nearly 19 and im 23 (we both still live at home with our parents.)Things started well, but after 2 months her dad decided to say we couldn't see each other anymore, his reasons?That she was "too young" to have a serious relationship and she needed to concentrate on uni.We had seen each other 3-4 times a week so it didnt even effect her uni work.We kept seeing each other in secret so only usually saw each other for a few hours at a time 3 times a week, it was really tough but worth it as we loved each other.Now it is the summer holidays so she has less excuses to give to see me (previously she would say she had lectures when she didnt etc). But now she has just taken a full time summer job.It means we are only going to see each other 6-11 on a friday night, and the occassional saturday night/monday tuesday night.I'm really gutted about this as i'm fairly needy and like to see her alot, and im wondering whether a relationship should be like this, but I do love her.Please give your opinions/adviceThanks Reply to this Question
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female
reader, adam0161 +, writes (4 June 2008):
adam0161 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks for taking time to respond Fiona,
Yes I told her i wanted her to take the job as I know its important for her career, I just dont know whether seeing her twice a week is gonna make me happy, and whether the time we do spend together will be valued enough as I can see myself possibly resenting her for taking the job, even though I know I shouldnt.
A
female
reader, Fiona xxx +, writes (4 June 2008):
 Things are tricky when you live at home with your parents. Perhaps they are strict and don't like the thought of you having an adult relationship together.
Studies and any part-time job, or holiday temp. jobs have to come first.
In my mind seing eachother just a couple of times a week has been plenty in my past experience. You are keeping some distance, while being keen if you see what I mean.
In a busy routine, twice a week is still a big priority.
If a relationship is meant to be, it will last any restrictions or distance apart. Absence makes the heart grow fonder, and makes you value your time together.
Even though we are married, we don't spend as much time together as you would think. For example when he goes to his parents house one evening a week, or I do a night school course. For example Saturdays are taken up with house work and everyday things.
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