A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:hi.10 weeks ago while my girlfriend was at work i watched a movie called three, it is classified as a thriller but has 2 sex scenes in it. Before this incident i had been going out with my girlfriend for 2months and she has told me she was insecure about her body. When she got back to mine i told her i had watched that movie not thinking ive done anything wrong, 1 week later she rents this movie and watches it, she goes mental and almost ends the relationship, it has now been another 10 weeks and she still brings it up i cant even mention the word movie without reminding her and getting upset. She always makes it my fault by saying sly remarks calling me a pervert and stuff like that and when i try and talk about it she cries and goes ballistic. She acts like i watched it to hurt or something when it is a thriller.Please Advise?
View related questions:
at work, insecure Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, babybutton  +, writes (19 July 2010):
 Sounds like she loves you and afraid of you fancying other women. Everywoman is insecure some show it more than others unfortunatly men don't understand this and the woman behaves more overbearing if you like. Reassure, tlc, but be carefull some men find it hard and feel thay have to stay or thay stray and it devestates and rewins everything!! Just tell she's bloody fit now n then and lol sugest movies together or films! X
A
male
reader, Illithid  +, writes (17 July 2010):
 Renting a movie to investigate what you've been watching because she cannot just trust your judgment, nearly ending a relationship over your seeing a movie just because it had sex scenes, and now still carrying a grudge ten weeks later. I'd hate to think what would happen if you did something REALLY bad, like failed to properly answer whether her butt looks fat in those pants.
Talk to her, calmly and gently some afternoon and explain that this is hurting YOU, that YOU are frustrated and concerned about this. She's playing the victim, but she's not being fair. If she threatens to leave you again, maybe you should consider letting her because if three months don't calm her down after you saw a MOVIE, then life will be hell with this girl. Do you want to spend your whole life dodging her tantrums, living in fear of her next irrational outburst?
But first things first, talk to her. As uplifting, calmly, supportively, and gently as you can.
...............................
A
female
reader, veronika +, writes (17 July 2010):
 It sounds like she needs help. As in, therapy.
Self esteem and body issues are common amongst young women (or women in general), but for her to overreact like that to you watching a movie with two sex scenes in it is inappropriate and seems a little immature.
...............................
A
female
reader, xanthic +, writes (17 July 2010):
 You've done nothing wrong, don't let her tell you otherwise. She has serious issues that need to be dealt with, and really should have been dealt with before she even considered being in a relationship.
The best thing for both of you would be to break up. She's not emotionally capable of being in a relationship, and will never be if she doesn't seek professional help to address her issues with jealousy and insecurity.
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (17 July 2010): Get rid of her. Sorry if that sounds harsh but she clearly has a lot of issues which are going to affect her behaviour towards you and if this is anything to go by, cause her to make unreasonable demands of you. She sounds quite immature and I am not sure she can handle a relationship if she reacts in this way to you watching the film. You are not a pervert, etc. She has clearly overreacted massively in my opinion. I don't think you will be able to change the way she is and her insecurities, she needs to do that herself. You are young and don't need to deal with this sort of nonsense. You've only been together for two months. Cut your losses and move on. I think this is only going to get worse.
...............................
|
