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female
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*pewlgrl
writes: My boyfriend have been going through a really tough time lately. He says that I always blow him off for my friends, and that I treat him terribly. How can I have fun with my friends, but show him that I care at the same time?...The worst part of it is that my bf hates my friends, and my friends hate him, and when I'm with him, they're mad...when I'm with them, he's mad. I'm sooo confused. I really need some advice. Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (21 May 2006): It's actually quite easy, but people tend to try to be a mediator between the friends and the lover. I believe that since this is the case, you should go to both parties and tell each side that A) you care about your friends, and love to spend time with them, but you love your boyfriend and that's that; and B) you love your boyfriend, and would love to spend time with him, but he doesn't make up your entire life, though he does make up a good portion of it. If he doesn't understand and accept that, then that means he isn't considerate of you enough. This same goes to your friends. If they cannot understand and will not accept that, then they are also not consider of you as well.
Then what you do is balance time with your friends, with your boyfriend, and then with your own private time - EVERYONE should have their own private time.
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