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male
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anonymous
writes: My girlfriend is from another country who is poor. At the time we haven't gone out that long, and I found out she sent a picture of her breasts over the internet to a guy that likes her. He no longer can see her since he had to go back to the United States, but she told me that she needed money to change her daughter's birth certificate, that she can't afford to pay a lawyer and basically was using this guy for money. She thought the picture would influence him to send more. She gave me her word that she was only using the guy for his money for her daughter and never liked him. We are very close and I know she's very committed to me. That I figured she was only sacrificing herself for her daugther.She now doesn't talk to him anymore but I'm concerned in how to handle this.
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reader, anonymous, writes (28 August 2005): Pops is right..Watch out, guy-this girl doesn't have the strong morals and a sense of committment to be in a loving, solid relationship with you. Think about it, any woman who sends nude picture of her breasts to extract money from a man-is got some skewed ideas about ethics and virtues. Many people are poor and experience hard times in life- but they find other better, more respectable ways to get the resources to help themselves.
If she's sincere, honest, reliable, responsible and relentless she will find a better way to make her life the best it can be, without conning a man for money. That's sinking pretty low. The more of these qualities your woman has, the smaller the chances of her being a dud. But if your woman lacks any of these characteristics, best to rethink this and fast.
Actions speak louder than words. This lady has shown you the extremes she'll go to to get what she wants.
And if she acts sweet and thoughtful with you, like a lady does, try not to be easily fooled. Because, then your emotional innards will be crushed after she shows her true self. Please be careful and guard your heart..good luck
Hugs,
Irish
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reader, Rebecca Batchelor +, writes (28 August 2005):
 What you need to seriously consider is whether A) She is entirely trustworthy and B) whether she is also only using you for money. I mean, has her financial situation improved? If not, be concerned that she may try to fleece you too as she has already shown she will use underhand ways to get money.
It could well be that she was desperate and she wouldn't do such a thing now she is properly with you. Only time will tell and you have to decide whether she is worth that risk.
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reader, anonymous, writes (28 August 2005): Since when does being poor allow an individual to 'use' another and it is suddenly OK. Where are the moral values here. How could you possibly want someone who would admit behavior that way. There are so many other avenues that could have been taken. I can't possibly see why you would even want her.
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reader, pops +, writes (28 August 2005):
Find another girl. This one uses people, and will use you, too.
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