A
male
age
36-40,
*ifecycle
writes:My girlfriend of 3 and a half years broke up with me 5 weeks ago, saying her feelings just wernt there anymore, but she still loved and cared for me. We had been coming to an end for what felt like 3-4 months, with me being frustated and her keeping things to herself, and of course we argued alot as well.For the first week or two, I found it very hard, felt like my life was over. The following 2-3 weeks I was ok, until this weekend, im finding it very hard and I feel like I want her back again.She contacted me after a week with general chat, to which I responded with the same. She said she felt she'd still made the right decision. A week later I asked her if she wanted to go out and catch up, she said she wasnt ready and maybe in a couple of weeks. 3 weeks later, with no contact inbetween, I asked her if she wanted to go out, to which she again said she thinks it'll still be awkward and that shes not ready yet. I asked why and she just said "because im not ready yet". I again asked her why, and that I dont want to start getting funny with eachother, she said she doesnt want me to think that anything could happen between us again. Even though I know we wasnt right for eachother and I often felt like I wasnt happy, I just cant seem to shake this upset feeling i've got at the moment. I always thought it'd be forever, and she was "the one". It was my first and only serious relationship.Can anyone help with me advice? I feel like my life is worthless even though I have a good job and great family and friends. I have no confidence to meet anyone new. It hurts to think im like this and she isnt, it feels like she hasnt looked back at all...
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, polkadotkitty +, writes (30 March 2008):
Firstly bless you for being such a good boyfriend and sticking to your girlfriend even through the bad times. Obviously three and a half years is a long time and so you are not used to being single. You do need to however move on. Chasing a relationship that you weren't happy in is never a good move. I know it is easy for me to say and i totally hate this phrase but there are plenty more fish. The more you try to get back to her the more she is likely to back off. From what I have read you sound like a decent guy and so loads of girls would queing (if thats how u spell it) up for you. I know that u feel like you have no confidence and i am not saying go out one night and club yourself to death but how about joining a club outside work- it can be anything that interests you as that is such an easy way to meet people and you never know what might happen. Good Luck adn i hope that you have found my advice usefulKeep strong and hang in there you'll find the one someday xHope u find my o
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