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male
,
anonymous
writes: When my girlfriend and I started going out, she used to go on about marriage and say things like 'When we get married' and things like this. I told her that I don't want her to say things like that as we are still young, im 18 and shes 16. She then calmed down a bit and was a bit off with me on a few occasions saying 'I was scared of marriage' in front of her mum and that. I basically said 'I don't want to get married for a long time'Yesterday she was talking about leap years and said that 'Women can ask men too marry them on leap years' and then she said that 'Thats what she'll have to do, and ask me on a leap year'. Which basically means that I won't ask her and she will have to ask me.Why is she acting so immature with this, we're both still young and it irritates me that she is thinking of this. She once told me a story of her brother and his ex girlfriend. They had been going out for 18 months and he took her to buy her a ring. The person behind the counter said 'Are you getting married' to which his girlfriend responded 'No, no we're not getting married'. Her brother was upset by this and my girlfriend thought this was completely out of order as they had been going out for almost two years.Im confused about this behaviour.
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male
reader, kenny  +, writes (15 February 2007):
 What you have got to remember is that when boys are growing up invariably they are in to sports cars, motobikes, and football. While girls that age dream of that white wedding with the lovely dress, the horse drawn carrage ect. Its probally just a fantasy of hers. I woulden't read to much in to it.
Good luck
A
female
reader, dragonette  +, writes (15 February 2007):
 Some women just seem to have this fantasy of getting married and wearing a skirt that has all the fluff of a meringue, and little brides maids littering the place with rose petals. They think taking vows are cute and that after the wedding they will live in eternal married bliss without having to lift a finger to work on their relationship.
Basically, at the age of 16 your girlfriend will have no clue on whom she wants to spend the rest of her life with (because she has a lot of mental development left to go through), but getting married may sound like a really romantic thing to her, and a surefire way to make sure you stay with her.
If I were you I would end this whole marriage fantasy once and for all by letting her know (in the kindest way possible, because after all you do love her) that you're not going to be pushed into a marriage before the "mature" age of 24, and only then if you have the type of stability in your relationship which leads you to be sure that you can remain for the rest of your life with the same partner.
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