A
male
age
51-59,
*addy1
writes:Dear Cupid, my girlfriend has never found it easy to orgasam with her partners but has done so on several occasions with me. However, what upsets me is that she never fails to when she is using a vibrator. Is this normal, should we be able to work on this together or is there something about vibrators which I can never match??? Cheers Patx ps she now says she won't use it when we are together because it upsets me.
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, TasteofIndia  +, writes (12 June 2007):
 Hi there,
Ahhh, the vibrator.
Don't feel bad. I can not stress this enough, don't feel bad. When a girl (or a guy) is handling things on their own, they always orgasm. Isn't it true that whenever you masturbate, you can make yourself orgasm? Well, your girlfriend knows which of her own buttons to push.
Sadly for you, your penis can not vibrate. THAT'S OKAY. I assure you, that even though the vibrator gives us orgasms nearly everytime, it's still not as good as the real thing. Sure we orgasm, but that's just a physical thing. We're not emotionally attached to the piece of plastic - we're emotionally attached to YOU.
You could (as some others have suggested) bring the vibrations into your sex life. It's lots of fun, for her AND for you. Trust me, vibrations will feel great on your man-parts. It's lots of fun going to adult toy stores together and picking out fun things to try out in the bedroom.
Be open, have fun!
Don't worry sweetness...
xxIndia
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (12 June 2007): Women know their bodies more than we ever will. If you can get her off, then be glad and leave it at that :) Cuz I know from experience the frustration of not being able to.
If i were you, incorporate the vibrator into your sex play. If you dont get her by the time you're done, introduce a new toy. Make her happy and she will make you the same!
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (12 June 2007): Oh, get over yourself. I think she's suffering more because she can't climax every time. You just have your feelings hurt some times...
Her problem, I promise, is 90% a physical one. If your tongue or penis could vibrate as fast or last as long as her dildo, then you wouldn't be here. Don't make her feel pressured to climax with you, find out what she likes in bed, enjoy yourself and that's that! Climaxing is NOT the point of sex.
(It's such a male mentality to think that climaxing is the point of sex...)
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A
male
reader, Paddy1 +, writes (12 June 2007):
Paddy1 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks mate and no am pleased to say that I'm not from Norwich (that would be too weird!!!) am getting used to the idea more and not feeling so worried but just intrigues me and is all part of the learning and communication. Thanks again and take care Patx
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (12 June 2007): Mate i had a girlfriend that was exactly the same,maybe you're going out with my ex.!! lol.your not from Norwich are you?? It doesnt mean there is anything wrong with you just that some women find it hard to orgasm through intercourse, i didn't have a problem with the sex toys in fact we used to buy them together, you should not be bothered about them either, in fact i would advise you to get involved in using them on her. Theres some cool ones out there with remote controls and alsorts. Seriously dont feel second best to a piece of plastic mate, its always easier for a girl to get off with one of those, you should speak to her openly about sex and ask what she likes and see if there is anything that you can both try together too make your sex life better. Anyway as i said dont get upset by them, get involved with them its far more fun. Good luck mate.
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