A
male
age
41-50,
*rivatepile
writes:Hi all1st time here and just looking for some advice. I'm with my girlfriend of 10 years. A few years back myself and my girlfriend broke up for a while.During this time she had thresomes, one with two other females and another two with 1 female and 1 male. The same female was involved in 2 of the threesomes and she also had sex with this female a few times.We got back together and have being going out since. My girlfriend has always promised me a threesome with this female, she has been out with her in a club a few times and they have kissed and dances really closely, but i still have not had a threesome with her.We also joined a swinging site and hoped to meet other couples but my girlfriend would no go through with this when it came down to it. Lately she told me she doesnt want to have a threesome.Whats really eating me up is she has had more sexual partners than me as well as a few threesomes but she wont have one with me. What does this mean?She has told me that she really enjoyed the threesomes but wont have one with me!
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broke up, got back together, swinging, threesome Reply to this Question
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male
reader, diamondave  +, writes (31 October 2010):
 You need to stop condemning them as freaks and start realizing that IT IS NORMAL for lots of people to feel this way.
Logic has no role in it, it's trying to fight emotional problems. Just like when you're attracted to someone who is bad for you. You might logically know you should leave them and logically not want to be hurt about it, but the emotional hurt won't just go away because you want it to.
A
male
reader, Yos  +, writes (7 September 2010):
 It sounds like you are suffering from something we usually call retroactive jealousy. This is an article about it:
http://www.dearcupid.org/question/retrograde-jealousy.html
I normally do not recommend threesomes in a relationship, but in your situation it's not so simple. It might actually help you get over this. Have you discussed your jealous feelings openly with your girlfriend?
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A
female
reader, person12345 +, writes (7 September 2010):
 Because when she had these threesomes, she was single. It doesn't mean anything to sleep with multiple people. But if you're in a couple and have a threesome, it is having sex with other people outside the relationship. You can't force her to have a threesome. Often having a threesome in a relationship ends pretty disastrously, as one person gets jealous. Why are you so set on having a threesome with this woman? Do you want to sleep with the other girl or something? If you keep pushing this you will drive her away.
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