A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:am confused me and my girlfriend we've dated for 5years now she caught with another chick at my place she got angry at me and she dumped me she got another boyfriend while we separated she got pregnant with the child of that guy while she's pregnant she came back to me want us to be in a relationship again I accepted and we still dating and we bond more than before this whole situation we planning to move together I really want to be with her but am confused about this child because to have my first child with her it was our dream but now she made a child with another guy I need help Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, JessC  +, writes (13 October 2016):
First of all, are you sure that the father is not you? As you can't count such things exactly, it's better to take non-invasive prenatal paternity testing https://dnasu.com/services/prenatal-test/ Formally, she didn't cheat at you, you had separated, but, of course, she shouldn't have done it. If you love her and want to be with her, there is an only option is try to forgive her and accept the child. Maybe don't sign the birth certificate. So if you want to divorce there less problems (in condition baby knows that you're not the father).
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (10 April 2015): I agree that you should walk away from this. Good intentions don't fix a permanent problem.
And there is a real possibility she only came back to you because she feels you would make a better husband/father than the other guy.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (9 April 2015): I'd say leave it. I've known people in your situation, they have all good intentions to start with but it just ends up in tears. I say that because it is easier said than done trying to love another mans child.
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A
male
reader, Fatherly Advice +, writes (9 April 2015):
 I don't see a problem if you are both committed to fidelity from this point of forever. If you are still thinking about other women, if she is still interested in changing partners frequently there is no point in either of you settling down at all.
There is one thing you need to get firmly settled in your mind. If you want to be with her you are going to have to be a father to a child of another man. If you can't love him as your own then you should not commit to this woman.
FA
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