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anonymous
writes: I've been going out with a girl for nearly two years and I REALLY like her. I thort she felt the same but recently she decided that she doesn't want to be with me anymore.Soon after she started to talk to me again and said that she is really sorry and that she really likes me still and wants to be with me but as she is still young (15) then she is not ready for such a commited relationship. But at the same time as this she is getting close to and meeting up with another guy. Not very often but she is meeting up with him as more than a friend.The problem is that she says that she doesn't really like this guy like that and that she isn't sure what she wants. I dont know wether she actually still likes me and wants to be with me like she said and its just that a relationship isn't a good idea at the moment, or wether she is just saying all that because she is trying to let me down slowly.I've got this idea as she sometimes come acrosss as if she really likes me and everything, but then at other times she comes across like she doesn't like me anymore at all. I dont know how she feels and she wont explain anything to me. I really dont know how to treat her anymore. I love her but I know we are too young for anything so commited as I am only 16 and she is 15.Somebody please help me before I go insane! What should I do?I was thinking i should leave her to have some space atm and go back to being like friends, then maybe try and build back our relationship after that. But I am scared that we will grow apart rather than get closer, and maybe that if I leave it she might think that I am not interested anymore! Sorry for the rambling; it's just that its really playing on my mind because she means so much to me, even though I am only young.Please give some advice, what should I do?!?!?!?!? Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A reader, olivia, writes (12 March 2005): It's hard for a girl to pick up if she likes you or not, so give her more time, then ask her "Do you like me or not. I need to know so I can tell you how I feel back."
A reader, Starr, writes (14 February 2005): I understand that right now you feel that you love this girl but you have to understand that you both are very young and trying to get into a commited relationship may not go as planned.My opinion is that maybe you should think about what it really is you want out of this relationship that you have.If at sometimes she acts as if she wants to be with you and other times she act as if she doesn't,then maybe you should take those actions to heed especially if she seems to be getting closer to someone else.Think to yourself about the times she acts like she likes you.Are those times when you are doing things with her at your expense?If so,maybe she likes you only when you do things for her and if that is the case,she is using you.Regardless at any age noone likes to be used or mistreated.If she is not as serious as you maybe you should just leave the relationship alone.
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reader, anonymous, writes (14 February 2005): Well first thing is, yes you guys are very young. But to me it seems as if she doesnt know what she wants, so instead she is gonna play mind games with you. If she loved you she wouldnt treat you like this. She is confused, thats all. I think you should back away from her and find someone who will treat you bettter. YOur feelings will fade for her and yes you guys will grow apart but you have to think as well, Do you wonna get treated like this? Do you like to be the second man? (if she is going with another guy like you say)Sorry to say this, but you have to make yourself happy, and you sound unhappy. Try seeing if maybe you hang out with your friends and see how things go when you back away from her. It might make you happy. IM sure you will find someone who will respect you in many ways. Dont worry; you're young yet and you have a lot of time left to meet other females. Just take one day at a time, sweety ok!
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