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anonymous
writes: I'm 18 and my girlfriend is almost 17. We've been together over 2 years. We're both still virgins, which to be honest doesn't bother me all that much, but she never wants to 'do stuff' (ie. masturbation etc) anymore. The last time we did stuff was about a month ago, and this was the first time we'd done anything for about 5 months. We used to regularly do stuff until about a year ago, when she lost interest. I can usually make her cum, so I don't think thats it... I know I made her cum last month. please help! I'm feeling very insecure.
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female
reader, Bev Conolly  +, writes (17 June 2005):
 I can only guess what's going through her mind, but I suspect that she's beginning to feel that the "stuff" is starting to be the only thing that's keeping you around. She may be wondering if you actually care for her, or if it's just the mutual-masturbation that you're interested in.
Of course, you don't indicate that this is a focus of your relationship with your girlfriend or that she's complained about it, but I remember being 17, and it was a time when I was eager for Romance (which I couldn't do for myself) much more than sexual release (which I could).
Try not to put too much pressure on her for the "stuff" that you miss. Show your girlfriend that you love her, not just what she can do for you. Spend a lot more time cuddling and talking and enjoying the other aspects of her company. I can almost guarantee to you that when she's reassured that you love her as a whole person, that she'll want to do Stuff again.
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