A
male
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:Hi,I'm not sure if this is me being insecure or overly protective. My girlfriend and I have been going out for 2 years. Recently in the past 2 months, she has been hanging with guy friend(s), I say this because she is not clear who she hangs out with nor how many guys, she just says "I'm going to play with friends" and leaves. Before, she would sometimes chill and hang out but not as much as now. Recently she would hang out with guy(s) usually at their house talking and occasionally drinking. She would hang out from 6-7pm to maybe 5am to even 7 in the morning saying she's just talking and drinking. To be honest, I would text her once or twice through the night to see what she's up to but she doesn't respond for probably 3-4 hours later, sometimes she would respond when she gets home maybe around 6am. I don't know what she is actually doing but maybe I'm over thinking this situation. Also she would hang out at my place in the afternoon (we don't live together) we eat lunch and relax. She naps for quite a while maybe from 2-4 or even 5pm because she says she is tired from the night before (hanging out really late with her guy friends) and if not then she just says she is tired for some reason. She leaves me around 6-7pm to hang out with her guy friends again, possibly really late again. This cycle repeats several times. I feel like she spends way more time with her friends than with me, let's say average 8 hours a day with her friends and 2-3 hours average with me. I don't mind her hanging out with guy friends but recently she hangs out with them a lot more, hanging out really late (she didn't use to hang out with guy friend or friends past 2am), and drinking with them now. How would I know she drinks? She tells me that just her friends want to drink but I can smell her breathe the next day and it reeks with alcohol. So I would like to hear opinions, I think it's me though or not? You tell me.btw past Thanksgiving she rather spend time with her guy friends for the whole weekend chilling and black friday shopping. She probably spent only 3 hours with me the whole Thanksgiving. This was the start of me noticing how she is taking concern with her guy friend(s).
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male
reader, Advice_man +, writes (19 December 2009):
 I don't know if she plans to brake up with you soon,...maybe. What it's really obvious though is that this girl is very disrespectfull to you and acts very selfishly... as if you do not exist or as if you are unimportant to her. Don't tollerate such attitude man. Abandon this relationship as fast as you can, you seem like a nice guy...you deserve better. Cheers!
A
reader, anonymous, writes (19 December 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThanks guys and gals, I will talk with her. Today she came over to at 7 in the morning slept until 11 (time i woke up) and left to her friends house to PICK up her stuff (jacket/laptop) and most likely going to hang with them for the rest of the night.
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A
female
reader, Aunty BimBim  +, writes (18 December 2009):
 from what you are telling us I think your relationship is in deep trouble.
You need to decide if you are willing to accept this situation and if you are do nothing, if you aren't then you need to confront her and explain that her behaviour is unacceptable. If she refuses to make any changes you will then need to decide whether you are going to tell her it's over or not.
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A
female
reader, acey lacey +, writes (18 December 2009):
 you definitely shouldnt feel like its not a big deal.. she is clearly abandoning you and spending immense time with other guys.. Do you know these guy friends? i mean why is she keeping up separate from them, she should have introduced you to them or something and all hang out together. AND you guys have been together for TWO YEARS--she might be tired of having a boyfriend and it sounds like youre a burden on her.. sadly. you need to speak to her seriously about her behavior and tell her how much it bothers you.. dont tell her to stop hanging out with them completely cause then she'll see how much it bothers you which might make her want to do it more but ask her to include you... and to spend less time with them and more time with you... you ARE her BOYFRIEND after all...
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