A
male
age
36-40,
*illing
writes:I have been with my partner for 5 years and at the moment I feel like we are an old married couple. We only have sex once a week, when we do it is amazing but it leaves me wanting more. We are only young after all! We have tried all sorts of things in bed, but her view is, "i've done it now i don't need to again". She does seem to want me but the effort is not there on her side, no oral sex or I have to initiate sex every-time. I have tried talking to her about it but she gets upset and goes quiet and thinks I will leave her! I don't want to but all you get in the media is women enjoying sex and wanting to please their men and she doesn't!Has the spark gone? Is there a way of getting it back?
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Emilysanswers +, writes (22 October 2008):
All you get in the media..... yeah, and the media is a very accurate way of finding out about what your girlfriend wants. Questions have been raised in parliament about lads mags and their portrayal of girls as "gagging for it" and as sex objects.
THE MEDIA LIES!!! It's all part of the airbrushing. They are hardly going to sell magazines with interviews saying "A lot of the time I am not in the mood and my boyfriend seems to nag more and more and it really puts me off him." Men buy magazines and papers to read about a fantasy girl who wants nothing more in life than to spend her time giving you blow jobs.
What you need to do is stop focusing on the fact you want her to satisfy you and work on making her feel wanted and sexy. Make sure every time you do have sex you really take your time and pleasure her so she doesn't feel like it's all about you. Tell her how gorgeous she is and how turned on she gets you when you see her washing up. If you make her feel like it's a duty then she'll act like it is.
Good Luck!! xx
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