A
male
,
anonymous
writes: a year ago my gf of three years had a friend do some sexual stuff for her over a webcam, when i asked about it she said she didn't look and that it hadn't happened before ( i'd read the msn conversation they had becuase i knew he liked her and had a rep for getting taken women to cheat on their bf's ), however a few months later in an arguement she admitted she did watch and it wasn't the first time, she said she's sorry, i thought it over a decided i wanted to still make a go of us. now i find i'm struggling to trust her, she hasn't done much to make not trust her, she's done plenty of things to show what i mean to her, but there are things that are getting to me, like the fact she a profile on faceparty.com. i know i should trust her, but i need some advice on how to accept that she isn't cheating. sorry if it seemed quite long winded.cheers
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male
reader, Mr.Ed +, writes (19 December 2005):
The old webcam thing. What is the difference between a webcam and a porno? Is seeing someone else exciting her really what's bothering you. Do you know for sure she sleeps next to YOU every night. Trust is a funny thing; others write flirting with their friends or conduct with a co-workers led to insecurity which leads to not trusting. I would have to assume that while I may not like the webcame thing in my life, Occasionally I do watch a porn now and then. My fiancee tells me that this is upsetting to her but I feel as though waking her up at 3:00 a.m. would hurt her more. You have also told yourself (and her) that you WANTED to continue the relationship. You made the choice to stay and now your not trusting. If she has not given you any more reasons to be suspicious then why are you still glotting on the past. If she has become addicted to that behavoir then I would seriously contemplate ending it. You sound like you love her and trust is very complex but communication with her is the best solution. Calmly sit down and try very hard to explain her point of view about it and find a way to progress not re-gress about your situation. Ask her what if you had done it, would she feel the same or does she have an opinion on it. Good luck.
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (19 December 2005): This girl is obviously not trust worthy there must have been more going on then she let on. no matter how much she means to you or you mean to her you can't let yourself be played you seem like a really nice guy and im sure you would have to problem finding someone new good luck with your desion! x x x x x x
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (19 December 2005): Sounds like your girlfriend doesn't want to put all her eggs in one basket. She's keeping her options open for someone better to come along by having a profile on face party and flirting with other men. If you can live with that, fine, but if you are looking for more commitment you will be left with a broken heart. She already knows she wont be with you forever.
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A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (19 December 2005): Im not that good at advice but you sound a bit like me just don't be paranoid-im always like this! If you like her so much just trust her but this should be her last chance if it happens again just forget about her.
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