A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Well Basically.. My best friend who is 14 years old has been checking this guy for about 2 months now, she didn't really want to go out with him but now its ok. But then we were on the bus to town and her bfs cousin come on he kept tryna flirt with ma mate and so her bf told his cousin to back off and so he did and went on chatting up our other mate we got to town and his cousin took our other mate behind some trolleys and me, my bestie and her bf wer standing there waiting for atleast 15mins we went round seeing them to snog and everything (we didnt expect that from her she was supposed to be the quiet one) after that she never said anything about it or told us anything. We never saw his cousin till today (1month later) and he was with his mates he said he had to talk to her and so us 4 went upstairs in MCD's and they sat seperate to us after half an hr she come back and she was like he keeps trying to ask her out and keeps trying to touch her, and she dont know what to do. he wast telling her to leaver her man and cheat on him etc she kept reminding him off what happen with our other mate and he kept saying that dont matter. So we went and 15 minz later we saw'm again and we walked around again and me n his mate stood ther waiting on the other side and i could see ma besties cousin with ma bestie trying to touch her she kept pushing him away. Later on they came back and she told me he keeps askin her if she's had sex and shes gota nice body n he had tried kissing her but she pushed him and sed he gave her a lovebite. And all he keeps saying to her is 'i love you, i want you, i love everything about you' Etc. They asked us to go back to there house but we had said 'no'. But now his even got her number from somewhere and keeps saying the same things. She doesnt know what to do. Because she doesnt want to create problems between her bf and his cousin. And she's totally confused and keeps breaking down. Is there anything i could do to help her? Please help
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best friend, cousin, flirt, kissing Reply to this Question
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female
reader, May13  +, writes (5 July 2009):
 Just don't ever ever keep them together, close... you two must always be there and never leave them alone no matter what the other says... and if your that other guy's family that keeps trying to hook up with his cousin's girl... talk to him... and if he won't stop.. you and her talk to her man about how he keeps acting and if he doesn't believe you two... then try to have proof of how his cousin's acting towards his girl... there must always be proof... i know for sure... it will work... and soon he wouldn't be allowed to be near her anymore... prove by: camera, voice recording, or him hiding somewhere... where he would never think of looking...
A
reader, anonymous, writes (10 June 2009): Make her block his number on her phone, tell her boyfriend to what extent his cousin is harrassing her He needs to know, and tell the cousin to stop trying to kiss her because that's sexual assault and you can call the police making a statement against him under the non-consenusal sexual act law.
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (8 June 2009): so she doesn't want any problems bet her bf and his cousin so she just accepts his sexual advances even though she 'acts" like she doesn't want it. she is playing a very dangerous game. i agree a little with pebbles. by keeping "quiet" she encourages his behaviour. she must tell her boyfriend EVERYTHING NOW. or else she will just continue claimimg she doesn't want to cause problems, next time it wouldn't just be kisses and a lovebite. next time he may just force himself onto her. then what? you kids are playing a dangerous game and someone is going to get hurt.
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A
female
reader, miss d +, writes (7 June 2009):
 pebbles i was saying you where wrong in saying it her fault n she deserves what she gets
x
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (7 June 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionThank you for all your help i'll try talk to her about all this. x
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A
female
reader, pebble +, writes (7 June 2009):
 Miss d, you just said "ignore pebbles she is wrong that she needs to tell her bf"
and then you yourself said
"she needs to tell her bf"
How does that make any sense? If we both agree she needs to tell her boyfriend then how am I wrong? lol
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A
female
reader, The Shadow's Tears +, writes (6 June 2009):
 she still needs to tell him, this couls ger worce
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A
female
reader, miss d +, writes (6 June 2009):
ignore pebbles she is wrong on that she needs to tell her bf b4 it gets worst its not her fault that hes obsessed wid her . yea maybe she mad 1 mistake in kisssin him but that was just one mistake and shes trying to leave it at that but he wont so she needs to tell her bf about what happend and that he wont leave her alone and see if he will try and help sort things out
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A
female
reader, pebble +, writes (6 June 2009):
That's what I'm saying - she might well be pushing him away but if she's letting him give her lovebites and kissing him then it's not giving him the same signals is she?
He's not going to back off if she's doing that stuff because that's what he wants. She needs to stop leading him on and stop doing that stuff completely.
And then if it still carries on the she needs to tell her boyfriend. Are you sure she only doesn't want to tell him because technically she's cheated with this guy? She started it all by giving him mixed signals, so she's the one that needs to sort it out.
She could threaten this guy with the police if he would listen to that, if it's at the point where he really is harrassing her then the police would listen and pay him a visit.
Or she could tell her parents to give him a good talking to - especially if she has a scary Dad or big brother.
But ultimately she needs to tell her boyfriend, he might be the person to sort it out if they're cousins. He's going to be angry at what she did, but she should have thought of that before.
If she needs help, she NEEDS to tell someone.
Good luck.
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reader, anonymous, writes (6 June 2009): This is verified as being by the original poster of the questionPebble she's pushed him away many times she's walked away from him she's also tried speaking to him but he doesnt listen. He'l just repeat the same thing over and over again and wont let her go. She doesnt want to tell her bf beause she doesnt want problems between him and his cousins.
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A
female
reader, pebble +, writes (5 June 2009):
Well, it's her fault for not putting her foot down and showing this guy that she doesn't want him. She's leading him on, no one forced her to kiss him and no one forced her to let him give her a lovebite (classy by the way). If she doesn't want the attention then she has to stop doing all this stuff.
If she's encouraging him then she deserves everything she gets.
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A
female
reader, The Shadow's Tears +, writes (5 June 2009):
OK i didnt really understand that, but she needs to tell her boyfriend whats going on, because if the cousin keeps up he may try to rape her or hurt her more. plus that's sexual assault and he can get arrested for it. i'm scared the cousin might get desperate and try to force her into something..hope this helps a littleX: Shadow Tears
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