A
female
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anonymous
writes: my friend at school "beatrice" has bad odors and i am afraid to tell her incase she gets offended, and hits me, she does need to have a wash and clean herself, maby shave but she doesnt realise that she smells real bad, what should i do. Reply to this Question Share |
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reader, anonymous, writes (13 July 2006): she may be a free spirit or hippy, and if thats the case understand her lifestyle.In her eyes she may see you as a "deoderant-that-causes-cancer-and-damages-the-enviorment" wearing uptight, which may in your case, just may be as insulting. But otherwise just make a joke out of it jsut laugh and say pee yew did someone cook something bad?!?! She may have already realized her own body odor, and she might feel guilty and do something about it later.You can always talk to her mother too if it gets too hard to tell her to her face.
A
female
reader, Bev Conolly +, writes (12 July 2006):
This is something that will come up again and again in your life. It's never easy to do, but sometimes you have to do it anyway.
Tell her something like "Beatrice, you know I'm your friend and I don't want to hurt your feelings, but you might not realise that your clothes have a bit of an odour to them. I'm only saying this because I think other people are noticing too."
Naturally, Beatrice will be embarrassed. (Wouldn't we all?) So plan to tell her this right at the end of the school day, so she can go straight home and take care of it.
Sometimes when people get embarrassed, they also get angry at themselves. It's a normal response, but it doesn't necessarily mean that Beatrice is angry with you. The next day when you see her, be sure to include her in everything, the same as normal, and if you can avoid mentioning the smell after she's started washing regularly, then don't.
You'll actually be doing her a big favour and being a good friend if you say it kindly and sensitively. Think of how you'd want to find out, if you suddenly found out that your friends thought you smelled, and you'll find the words.
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A
female
reader, willywombat +, writes (12 July 2006):
Tell a teacher or trusted adult and ask them to broach the subject with her.
x
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A
female
reader, Angelicc +, writes (12 July 2006):
Has her friend really is her duty to tell her.
Take her to the side, tell her that your her friend and if you were in the same situation you would want her to tell you. Tell in the nicest way that you can.
Because if you don't someone else will and it won't be nice and will be very embarrassing for her.
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