A
male
age
41-50,
*andonM
writes:I have been in a relationship with my woman for 12 years. We are still both not married. We were engaged early this millenium until I found out from her electronic mail that she's been cheating on me. We mended that problem and I stayed.We are in the planning stages of a wedding in the next two years. I love her. She loves me. We are partners and companions at the same time. She's my best friend. I am happy with her. She is happy with me. She hasn't cheated on me since that incident. Or maybe I decided not to worry about that anymore.Well, a woman at work who I find very attractive has fallen for me. We had a good conversation and she wants to take it to the next level. That woman made me feel very sexy because she is pursuing me everyday. I'd love to be ignorant and give in to temptation. But already my guilt is killing me. I love my fiancee. I am happy with her. And I don't want to destroy what we have. However, if I hit that woman from work now, I dont think it is as bad as an affair while married. With the thought that my game is ending soon, a part of me wants to let my urges go with this woman (from work). But I don't want to take anything to the next level with this woman (from work).Help me please, fellas. Even women. Thanks!
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affair, at work, best friend, cheated on me, engaged, fiance, wedding Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (12 December 2007): Thanks. I do feel as though the woman is being a bit pushy. She'd email me everyday telling me how she thought of me the night before. It's freaking me out a little bit. She's even email me whenever she sees me with my female coworkers, who is my team mate that I have worked with for 3 years. She'd have an issue with that. I am not even in a relationship with her!!!
Collaroy, thanks. It is now apparent that there's a bit of obsession going on with that woman.
So how do I stop it? I want to stop it. But she doesn't seem to want to stop it. She keeps messing with my emails everyday. Sometimes a dozen times a day.
A
female
reader, Oddball.x  +, writes (12 December 2007):
 It's a really bad idea.
Just because she made a silly mistake dosnt mean you should.
It can really ruin your life.
Only bad can come of it.
If you love her, then you'l be faithful.
Dont listen to them.
x
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (11 December 2007): two wrongs don't make a right. think about how much you could screw up if your fiance found out. you may've forgiven her bu she might not forgive you. just don't do it.
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A
male
reader, Collaroy  +, writes (11 December 2007):
 Hi,
it sounds like you really havent gotten closure over your partner's infidelity. I say this because you use her infidelity as justification to why it wouldnt be too bad for you to get a taste yourself before marriage.
The way you wrote this sounds like a spoiler for the film Fatal Attraction. Man, you got to be careful here, if you pursue a girl from work , do you really think she will just be interested in sex? Maybe, but the bigger likelihood is she will want more. A girl who is actively pursing a guy with a girlfriend in the workplace, is not going to be a put up and shut up type of girl. She will want the whole package. Chances are if you have sex with this girl, she will have a hold over you as you work together, she knows a lot about you, and the real killer, she will be able to contact your current partner to let her know all about it if you fall out.
Dude, seriously, don't go there.
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