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anonymous
writes:
My husband left me four years ago and I still love him and want him.
He is living with a woman 26 years younger than him - he is 65.
I haven't been able to move on.
I have a male friend but unfortunately he has no interest in lovemaking and cannot get aroused unless it is a fetish scenario. I have tried this but it has not been fulfilling. I don't just need sex I need to be made love to and to know that I am desired for me and not as something covered in black rubber. I find it a total turn off.
During the few years we have been together I can honestly say that I have kept my vows to my husband.
I don't know what to do I am 63 years old, quite attractive and have a lot to offer someone I love.
I still have needs.
Margaret
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female
reader, jessickah  +, writes (9 August 2012):
Dump him and move on. It's about time. You sound like a very educated, attractive woman. Any guy would be lucky to have you. :)
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reader, anonymous, writes (11 January 2006): I agree..You do sound tremendously lonely. By permitting yourself to be in a "nowhere' relationship with this man (and his fetishes) you seem to be isolating yourself emotionally even more. When I hear about a yearning for unrequited love, denial and retreating, all at the same time... I would recommend you get yourself into counselling and a support group to help you alleviate your inner struggles. You haven't recovered from the truama and pain of your husband's abandonment of you. Support groups will also get you out of your sadness and isolation and get you listening and interacting with a wide variety of people. Good luck
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reader, anonymous, writes (11 January 2006): I am sorry for all you have endured, Margaret. And yes, you do still have needs but you do sound very lonely and still scrunched up in pain from your past marriage problems. And I understand. But, this will keep 'eating' away at your soul and your self-esteem, Margaret and I think you need some emotional support. Have you thought about counselling..these therapists are wonderful. Please think on that-they could be anormous help to you. Realize, your husband has made his choice. If this woman has been with him for 4 years, chances are, his relationship with her is permanent. Dear, ou must move on to a better, more happier place with your life because hope alone, will never bring you fulfillment in life. One has to get proactive and make their own happiness-it's matter of choosing one's own path. Sometimes painful experiences teach us the greatest lessons. People spend a lifetime looking for a sense of significance and security but often times find they have been looking in all the wrong places. This could be you. Sadly, you won't find it with this man who has fetishes..he has his own agendas and it's just wearing on your self-value. So get out of that scene. I think you shouldn't be so focused on what you need but think of what you can offer others like family and friends. Staying positive, cheerful and allowing your inner glow to come out..will attract people to you. Volunteering..giving of yourself to others will reap so many rewards for you and it's a wonderful way to meet others. Learning to pray helps. I'm not a huge spiritual person but praying has helped me through some tough times. Keep praying for guidance and strength and don't look back. Instead, keep your eyes on the future and try to gain a new perspective on 'living well' and being happy. Good luck and take care of you.
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reader, anonymous, writes (13 May 2005): You need to move on. This guy sounds pretty sick; he is not doing you any good at all. There are some pretty decent guys out there, dump this freak and good luck!
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