A
female
age
30-35,
*olahip
writes:Okay , first off i'll tell you the good part. My family have always taken me on days out , bought me treats and treated me well , but i dont think they truly understand me. My elder sister makes fun of my weight (Which I Am INCREDIBLY Sensitive About) , my taste in music , sometimes even my clothes. But it was only an hour ago she gave me some of her cake. My mother gives me sweets often , and is always worrying over me and making sure im safe , but she often makes sarcastic comments that i pretend i dont care about even though they can sometimes make me feel... i dont know. its like a sad , depressed little feeling deep in me.But My Father , I love so much. But he always takes my mothers side and then he shouts at me , and i have a sneaky feeling my mother often winds me up just to make me do something bad so she can have a go at me, Maybe im just paranoid , they have always been great parents for me , but i don't know what to do. P.S , My elder sister can lie her way thorugh anything , so when i run downstairs saying truthfully she called me a name , she'll twist it round ,so i get in trouble and my mum never beleives me! So what do i do about my sister and parents. And i cannot talk to them , they will just probably laugh and say i'm being silly.
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reader, anonymous, writes (2 January 2013): Sorry you feel like this... Maybe it will get better with time and when you move out of your parent's (e.g. when you go to university) as they will see you less, and therefore will prefer to cherish their time with you instead of picking on you.
When you feel like they are messing with you, you could try to call them out on it in a calm manner "why do you call me X...?" or "When you call me X, it hurts my feelings...". If you feel like it is too much to bear and makes you cringe, instead of giving into the provocation: just leave the room they are in and take a breather, or talk to a friend who is aware of your family situation to unwind.
If you feel like you can't speak to your parents and sister face to face, maybe you can write a letter stating what is troubling you. They will have no choice but to read it and also you can state all the points you wanted to bring up without interruption. It can also be therapeutic to write down what you feel.
I hope the situation resolves with your family!
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