A
male
age
26-29,
*rns96
writes: I have a friend "Agenol". He moved from our city, to Britain about 2 years ago. Last year, he came back to our city in America for a brief vacation. While here, he "got freaky" with my ex "Daniela". I don't care that they were together; I'm not jealous. Agenol went back to Britain. Daniela got pregnant. She decided to keep the baby, and he's only a couple weeks away from birth now. Daniela, while trying to be strong for her son, is freaking. Agenol hasn't been heard from since his second departure to Britain. She hasn't even thought of a name, but she has come to me (her ex of nearly 3 years) begging for me to be her child's father figure. Call me Joe. And let's say her last name is Aguilar. She's talking about naming the child Joseph Agenol Aguilar. I have a girlfriend, but Daniela doesn't want me romantically anyway. She simply doesn't want her son without a father figure. And she believes I'm the best "father" she knows. I am flattered, but I don't know if I'm ready to be any kind of father. Is any guy ever? I'm wiling to take on the responsibility, but I don't know what to do or how to handle this. HELP!...please... :/
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male
reader, TimmD +, writes (20 December 2010):
Do not get locked into anything "official" or legal with this girl or her child. You don't need a commitment that you are locked into for the rest of your life that is not your doing. Such a commitment could serious disrupt your own personal life and your ability to have relationships later in life
If you would like to help this girl and her child, fine, but do so on your own part. Tell your ex that you are willing to help, but it is not fair to lock you in as a "father". If you are able to, you will help. But otherwise she needs to take responsibility for the choices she made in the past. You have a girlfriend and have to worry about your own future.
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