A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:My ex bf has just asked me for 125 2 pay off a speading ticket he got and 6 points, i said i have 2 think about it i know i will get the money back, but he has a new gf and hasent even told her he has got caught speeding Im also not sure if hes telling me the truth as i dont really no about speeding tickets isnt the money a bit steep for that sort of thing, he was undertaking and going twice the limit,I even asked him stright if he was telling the truth and he said cheers if i wanted it for something else i would tell u stright,ive also asked a mate and he said that u have to pay by card or cheque but he wanted cash anyway no anything about speeding tickets ?plese help me
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female
reader, SirenaBlusera  +, writes (3 May 2009):
 First of all, have you even SEEN the ticket? He could be lying. Perhaps he just wants the money.
It's his fault that he got the speeding ticket, he was speeding. Speeding means risking other people's lives, and he was lucky he got off with a fine. What if he'd caused a serious accident? I have never had a speeding ticket and never will. He deserved to get the ticket if he was speeding, and you are not responsible for him.
You don't owe him anything. If he was speeding, he deserves the ticket. How brazen of him to ask you for the money.
A
male
reader, LazyGuy  +, writes (3 May 2009):
 Undertaking? You mean he broke the speed limit with a hearse?
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ImOS-7vWLWA I guess explains this.
He is your ex, he is with someone else. That means it is over. What connection remains that you should pay HIS fine? What connection remains that he should feel capable of asking you for anything?
I really don't get this. What is it with women that they feel they got to take care of ex-bf's. Lets just hope you lead a chaste life, or soon you will have dozen of exes begging for cash.
If he is an ex with kids involved then yes, I might understand your desire to have a good relationship but if that is not the case what makes you feel this is even a question he has the right to ask?
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A
female
reader, DrPsych +, writes (3 May 2009):
 When you get a vehicle-related offence, you are permitted to pay by cards as well as cash. 6 points is a significant blow to a drivers license and I personally hate dangerous drivers. He may have acquired late penalties on the fine, or it could relate to more than one fine. Basically if you are going to give him the money make him sign a receipt saying he has borrowed this money from you and will be paying you back on x-date as you would have no evidence of the cash payment otherwise. If he doesn't pay you at least you have evidence of the transaction which can go before the small claims court if needed. Personally I think you shouldn't be bailing out an ex-boyfriend.
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A
male
reader, ArmyMedic +, writes (3 May 2009):
 £125 and 6 points that means he was going very fast! probably over 90mph, in a national speed limit road. He deserves the points and the fine, it's lucky he got caught and didn't kill some one! Let it be a lesson to him, his crime, his punishment!
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (3 May 2009): I thought that sounded a bit steep too, but I imagine he would have had a fine on top of the speeding ticket for that sort of stupid behaviour.
Whether you're sure you'll get the money back isn't really the issue here. Fines are supposed to be a form of punishment, and for most people when that punishment hits their pocket it hurts the most - short of being sent to prison. If you give him the money, what sort of punishment would that be?
Magistrates don't levy fines on people that have no hope of paying them off. He would have had to fill in a form stating his income and expenditure to determine his disposable income before he even entered the courtroom. That would have been taken into account, and he wouldn't have to pay it all at once if he couldn't afford to do that. He could pay it off by instalments.
I say don't do it - he's your ex after all - his stupid behaviour is his own responsibility. Why should you go short of cash because your idiot of an ex decided to break the law? If I was the magistrate I would have locked him up!
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (3 May 2009): No! Don't do it! It's his fault he's got the ticket so it's up to him to sort it out. He can't keep running back to you everytime he has a problem.
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