A
female
age
36-40,
anonymous
writes:My ex and I had been living together for over a year when we broke up in July. He had been acting distant and cold for a while, and I could not bear it anymore so I pretty much had to get him to tell me what he was feeling. He said he was confused, he wasn't sure about anything, that he "just can't do it anymore". This was almost two months ago and he hasn't moved out yet. He is trying to buy a house. I am having a hard time dealing with my emotions. He says once he moves out he just needs a month or two to think about things and to figure out what he wants. But everyday that goes by is just too hard for me. He is always at work (starting a company) and anytime I try to talk about something halfway serious, he completely ignores me, is sarcastic, or changes the subject. He says that he loves me without a doubt and always will, and until lately he really was amazing to me. I truly believe he loves me but I don't know what's going on. I told him that if he just didnt want to be with me, that if he knew I wasn't someone he wanted to be with, that he could tell me. I made sure he knew he could tell me anything. But he leaves everything in the air, he just needs time to 'think'. I also found out that he has been replying to local personal ads from girls who basically just want sex, no strings attached. I told him about this, he said that he isnt looking for anyone, that he wants to re-evaluate our relationship, and that "it's just a website". I don't know what to think anymore. I gave this man everything I could and he led me to believe we would be together forever. I wish he would tell me if he were scared or just changed his mind, anything! I just want the truth. He thought I was talking to a guy on the phone the other day (it was just a female friend) and he got upset. I don't understand. If he doesn't want me, then why should it matter? I should also mention that he still holds me everynight, tells me he loves me, and things like that. I am so confused, hurt, and if I'm being a stupid girl I would really like to know.
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female
reader, baybee-x-sparkii  +, writes (8 September 2007):
 your not being stupid here, your allowed to think this, maybe this guy needs a "push in the right direction" as this behaviour is out of order towards you, he shouldnt be treating u like this, i think u just need to get everything out in the open and sort things through, that way you both know where you stand...and then once this is done maybe u can either go in ur own direction..or start again?Good Luckx
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