A
female
age
51-59,
*ella927
writes:I have a simple question-(Maybe) I was dating this guy for close to 3 years-and he was an alcoholic-I found this out after 1 year with him-I tried counseling with him (He agreed to go on his own not forced) to my counselor of 8 years! Well long story short-when he began to be more abusive and his alcoholism started spiraling down...I knew I need to end the relationship (restraining order) I was losing myself and after all I had done to create a better person within me I was not about to have that taken away. He stated on many occasions what bleep my counselor was and how she did not help me quack quack like an alcholic does! Anyway my question is: He is now going to my counselor I found out and I do not feel that it is right to be doing that-I feel a little betrayed although I know that it is not about me-it is just that with all the other counselors out there why mine!Is this right for him to be seeking out my counselor for help?
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reader, anonymous, writes (23 July 2007): Your counsellor should have checked with you first because there is a potential conflict of interest. That would have been respectful, this will make you think twice before speaking with him/her about certain issues and is therefor not a very professional situation.
A
female
reader, eyeswideopen +, writes (18 July 2007):
 Sure it's okay, she is bound by ethics not to discuss you and your sessions with anybody else. Just be glad he is getting counseling.
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A
female
reader, Beckto +, writes (18 July 2007):
 He may be going to the same counselor as you because he is familliar with her. If your counselor is any good, then absolutly no information about you will be given to him and vice versa. That is absolutely against the law and against patient-doctor guidelines.
If you're concerned, bring it up with your therapist. Let her know that you feel uncomfortable that your ex is seeing her as well. Maybe she'll have some words of wisdom.
Be happy for him, now that he seems to be trying to address his issues. And be flattered that he chose the same therapist that you recommended initially! And remember, it's not always about you.
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