A
male
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Me and my ex have been broken up now for 2 1/2 months. 3 1/2 weeks after establishing NC she contacts me telling me she's been thinking about me constantly and has been missing me incredibly. Well I kept my guard up by not acting desperate and giving in. I didn't even know her intentions so I proceded with caution. This is also due to the fact that she claimed I was too dependent and needy of her so I want to show her I can be independent. We ended up meeting a week later and talked. I continued to keep my guard up and she just wanted to see how I've been doing.We've been talking on and off every week. Always responding to her text either the next day or several hours later. She's always the one to start contact with me, either through txt or phone call yet whenever she contacts me and wants to talk she never really has anything to talk about, she remains quiet while I talk and she just responds to what I say. Last Sunday she asked me to call her so I did and we talked 10 min. But she didn't really have anything to say. Then Thursday she contacts me but I got back to her yesterday and we talked through txt all day. Again though she behaved the same way.My question is why is she contacting me but acts as if she has nothing to say? It honestly is getting me no where. I want her back more than ever and I love her, she broke up with me. I can't tell what her intentions are and I don't see this getting anywhere. Would it just be reasonable to just ask if there is anything in particular she wants to talk about? Could there be something she wants to talk about or is she just using me?
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (23 May 2010): Yeah well odd thing is I wrote her back the the other day because the night before she asked if I wanted to talk but I was asleep so yesterday I wrote her saying that I'm hanging out with my friend but we can talk later if she wants. Odd thing is she never got back to me =( she usually always does. Could that mean she no longer cares to get back with me or anything?
A
female
reader, Laura1318  +, writes (23 May 2010):
 It is possible that she is just dangling you in mid air as she does not want to give you up but at the same time , she is not too keen on you too.
More like a stop gap measure until she finds someone better.
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A
female
reader, Moo's Mum  +, writes (23 May 2010):
 I think you need to say to her "Look what's going on here? I want to get back together with you but I can't figure out what you want from me. Where are we headed?" At least then you will know whether to continue to try and figure this out. It's too hard on the nerves emotions and well being walking the tight rope constantly.
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A
female
reader, YouWish +, writes (23 May 2010):
 She's testing you to see if you will revert to your "dependent" ways. But, I'll say this, you shouldn't go after anyone who won't let you be yourself. Next time she contacts you, you make HER carry the conversation by asking her questions. Make it a point to let her talk more than you. And don't ask her open-ended questions either. Talk about current events, the news, TV shows, things that interest her. And above all, END THE CONVERSATION before she wants to. Get her wanting more! If you can get her to say "Aww" when you say you've gotta go, you've got her. Be interesting - have a lot going on and don't be constantly available to her!
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