A
male
age
41-50,
*aralyzed
writes: havne't heard from the ex in 2 weeks. I've dropped off the face of the earth and avoided her. Sunday night i get the text message. "I have a book, movie, and a bowl belonging to you. Let me know if you want them". She has had these items for over a month now. I have not looked for them and I wasn't going to look for them. I had written them off. Like all of us I struggled with how to respond. I waited a day and sent this yesterday "I can pick them up when you are home, or you can leave them in a bag on your deck". Her reply 4 hours later "should be home by 10, or I can leave it on the deck". My reply "let me know when you're home, if its too late just leave it on the deck". I didn't hear from her until 10:45. "Wont be home until 11:20. Is that too late?" Finally, catching on that this was another attempt at playing childish games, I simply responded "yes, leave it on the deck. thanks." I can't believe i actually considered going to her place. I've been so trained to wait for her to contact me and then seduce me when she thinks she wants me back. I'm glad I had another rude awakening. I needed it. I'm glad i didn't rush up there and agree to drive 30 minutes up and back so late in the night for items i didn't really care that I saw ever again. I've given in to these childish games enough. I realize that. So, when she texted me again this morning "Paralyzed, bag is under the bbq triple bagged so it should stay dry :-)", I didn't and will not respond. I will pick it up, and never play into this garbage anymore. 2 weeks of avoiding her was starting to work. This is nothing but a speed bump. I just don't understand the whole point of what they do. Does anyone else have any input or advice?
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
reader, anonymous, writes (3 November 2009): If she is trying to get you back then you need to be firm and let her know that its over, so she can start getting over it.
Both men and women do this, they just dont want to finish with you and cant accept that its over.
Thats why you need to be firm (for one girl who cheated on me with 3 other guys I had to yell down the phone stop f#$%^% calling me)
After this dont bother answering anymore
A
male
reader, duce00 +, writes (3 November 2009):
You are on the right track I think. This woman is a game player by all accounts. Just keep steering clear and your head will clear up. Her games have worked on you in the past and to be fair that is your own fault. Don't take it wrong my boy, you are in a large crowd of men who have played into this kind of thing (myself included).
There will come a point when you have absolutely no confusion about her. There will also come a point when the next lucky guy steps into your shoes...and the next....and the next...and the next.
Don't look back bro!
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