A
female
age
26-29,
anonymous
writes: Hello there! I wanted to ask advice about the current situation I'm in. A couple of months ago, I broke up with my ex, whom I'll refer to as M. We had gone out for a while. but during the relationship, M didn't spend any time with me, always chose to be with his friends instead of spending an hour with me, and in general, didn't really treat me like I was his girlfriend. Don't get me wrong, M is a really good person, (he is genuinely caring and polite and humorous) and we're still quite good friends. During my relationship with M, my current boyfriend confessed to me and was at the time my best friend. I'll refer to my current boyfriend as S. S is really amazing - does the right things, not just says he'll do them, and he's always looking out for me and is always willing to make time for me, which I appreciate. S and I have been going out for a while, and it's not the case where I'm going out with S to make M jealous or anything like that. The problem is that M has been starting to act weirdly recently. Ever since I got together with S, M would suddenly appear everywhere - he'd suddenly be free to spend time with me and hang out. He's always finding some sort of excuse to talk to me; for example, the other day, it was really hot and he asked if he could borrow my deodorant. Obviously, I gave it out of politeness, but as I gave it to him, he stroked my fingers - and I don't mean the accidental touch that happens when someone passes something to another person - M was literally stroking my fingers. S is aware that he's been trying to get closer. I'm aware he doesn't like M, not just because he's my ex, but because of the way M had treated me, but I don't like how S reacts to M. S tends to get really rude to M, sometimes even when M hasn't done anything at all. I think I should mention that both M and S are classmates and that I have more classes with M than with S, however, me and S always try to make time for each other every day, whether it is simply through texting. I don't understand why M is acting the way he is, and I don't know how to get S to stop being unnecessarily rude. Do you think you can give me any sort of advice that can help"
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best friend, broke up, jealous, my ex, text Reply to this Question Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, aunt honesty +, writes (14 May 2018):
If you like S then you need to cut M out of your life. You need to tell him that you cannot be friends and avoid him. I mean how would you feel if it was an ex of s' asking for deodorant and stroking his fingers? If you want the new relationship to work you need to let go of M. S doesn't need to like M so just ask him to avoid him and leave it at that.
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