A
female
age
26-29,
anonymous
writes:Ikay so my ex and i dated when we were 15 up until the day before i turned 18. We broke up because he wanted to have his freedoms, live his life, yada yada. Well its been over a year since he and i broke up. And lately hes on my mind all the time. I had posted something the other day saying "sometimes i wonder what we couldve been.." never said names or anything. Keep in mind yes i have had 2 other boyfriends after him but neither has seemed to work out. So no one knew who i was refering to. Well he out of the blue messages me asking if its about him. I at first tell him id rather not talk about it with him only 2 people know who its really about. He said he understood, then curiously wondering why he thought it could be him i fess up and tell him. He admits to me that i was his first real love and he will always love me. And then informs me if he hadnt just left for the army for the next 3 years he would even be up for giving us another chance... You think i would be happy and overwhelmed with joy, but im not.. I just want to cry. And im not sure why. Can anyone explain to me why this is upsetting to me and why it hurts so much??
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female
reader, anonymous, writes (22 November 2015): Oh dear, I can see why your instinct is to cry, you've just been hit with a big one in this fragile time! Emotional roller coaster. It's not surprising you're hurting so much, you've just been given that hope you've been dreaming of but at the same time being told it can't really happen for 3 years! You could always talk about how a long distance relationship could work with you two, Skype dates etc but 3 years is a long time!Personally I would recommend seeing other people, after all it's a good way to get over someone.. Just to pass the time so you don't drive yourself crazy, then in 3 years see if you still feel the same. You'll probably find that you won't. Girl to girl now, I've been through this, and I think you'll find that getting back isn't as magical as you think it could be, you'll see you both broke up for a reason, and trust me at your age you will find guys greater than you can imagine out there, try not to feel sad because there's somone amazing around the corner. Maybe this is fate showing you to move forward instead of backward. You will always have that option waiting for you in three years. Talk to one another though, you two might be able to make long distance work. But think about it, remember you don't have to respond straight away, take a few days to think and let out your emotions - sob over sad movies if it helps! Then make the decision on a clear conscience. Good luck with whatever you decide sweetie x
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