A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:hi everyone, i just dont know what to think or do about the situation im in, after 20 yrs of marrage, my husband decided he wanted to leave, he also decided that he wanted a younger woman, so i decided to file for my divorce, place a restraining order on him and try to move on with my life. well the other day my oldest son comes to me and tells me he talked to his dad, and that his dad wants to come back home, he said that his father, said that he made a big mistake and that he wants to come back and work things out, he also said that his father told him that the other woman was mean to him, that she was trying to push him into marrying him, after his divorce with me is final, he said that his father had ask him to come and talk to me to see if i would let him come back, he told my son that the other woman was whacked and follows him everywhere he goes, and is very very abusive to him, he also said this other womans x bf came to her house and started threatening him and calling him names, he said his father told the other woman he was gonna leave and that he moved out of her home into another place, he said that his father has ask him to talk to me and then let him know, i told my son that i would talk to his dad just to see what he was up to, my son went back to tell his father i agreed to talk to him and only talk to him, but now he isnt anywhere to be found, i just dont know what to think about all this, i hope someone can help me understand what it is my husband is up to, thanks!
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (5 July 2008): Your husband needs to speak to you directly and not through your children. BUT! You also have to bear in mind about whether he genuinely wants to come back and be loyal, faithful and loving or if he is just using you as both a get-out clause with the other woman and a nice, safe, comfortable place to lick his wounds before heading off again. After all, your bed and home are more comfortable than a friends couch! So let him contact you and be sure that he's not using you as a convenience.
A
female
reader, Aunt Audrey  +, writes (5 July 2008):
 If your ex wants to talk to you about a possibe reconciliaton let him contact you. I don't think that it's right your son is in the middle of all this, and what proof do you have that this conversation actually took place between your ex and your son, you don't say how old your son is, but could he have be trying to get you back together in his own way, kids can become quite cunning when their parents split.
I think you will have to wait for your ex to be more forthcoming with regards to his feelings, just say to your son that you are not prepared to discuss the situation with him and should his father want to talk he knows where you are.
Good luck
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