A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:My ex-boyfriend and I are in the process of rebuilding our once really close friendship and had agreed to see each other Thursday.He cancelled on me Thursday and I got upset because I had rearranged my schedule around for him. So we stopped speaking to one another. Then Saturday morning I bumped into him and he didn't even acknowledge my presence and then Saturday night I saw him again and it took him quite awhile to even wave hi. I went up and gave him a hug. And tonight I talked to him tonight and asked him why he a) wasn't talking to me and b) why he didn't want to hang out and he said, "Because you got pissy at me on Thursday and Saturday you were all friendly." And he hung up on me.Why? Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Emilysanswers  +, writes (17 September 2008):
The problem with this is there are still too many feelings involved. If it was just a friend you were meeting, you would have said "sorry can't do Thursday" but you didn't, you re-arranged everything for him.
If you had arranged to meet a friend on a free night, and then they had to cancel, you'd have said "aww that's a shame, well another time then!"
But you'd re-arranged everything and gone to a special effort for him, so you were annoyed.
He's going to be super sensitive about you getting annoyed because of all the times you were annoyed with each other during the break up.
I don't think the two of you are quite ready to let go of all those feelings and be friends again. Keep in touch but treat him like a casual friend rather than going to special effort for him and it should be fine.
It will take time. This is just part of the transition.
Good Luck!! xx
A
female
reader, littlesuziepie +, writes (17 September 2008):
 This is just my opinion but maybe he wasn't sure things would work out between you two again and when he said he would go out with you Thursday he wanted to but then tested you by canceling on you to see your reaction. If you didn't make a big deal over it he wouldn't have reacted the way you did.
He wanted to make sure that when things didn't go your way you didn't get pissed off especially since your in the repair part of the relationship.
Yes it was rude of him to cancel but that's a guy. We think different and what we see as rude they don't always.
So all in all he didn't expect that you should be so upset and you scared him away by getting upset.
He doesn't want all the pressure in the relationship.
And I probably used the wrong words when I said he was testing you.
He might have just really had to cancel but you got mad and that's not what he wants to go running back to.
Again just my opinion.
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