A
female
age
36-40,
*essi13
writes:my ex and I are talking again we've been dating 4yrs now and we recently started talking again we've had alot of arguments and rough times i'm 20 and he's 28 right now we're trying to work at things but he's still talking to other girls aswell as i am talking to other guys we don't want to get back together without working out are situation but he tells me he wants to get his stuff together and that he loves me but yet he talks to other girls is this normal for us to talk to other people? we are not officially together yet. he's been calling me alot and has me sleeping at his house and we've really been spending alot of time together but i'm just confused if this is ok for him to be talking to other girls he tells me he hasn't had any sexual intercourse with any that they are just friends and to just worry about me and him lastnight we had a bbq at my brothers and he was a bit tipsy he was acting jelous for no reason and then the next minute he's telling me he misses me and what not i don't know i really need advice urgent!!
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female
reader, Yessi13 +, writes (7 July 2008):
Yessi13 is verified as being by the original poster of the question well yes of course I do we just clash alot and i'm trying to change that and well i guess i want everything right there right now and he always tells me that's why we can't eb together untill we change that he rather wait and fix the problem and meanwhile do what we have to do before getting ourselves in the same situation, but sometimes i feel insecure about him talking to other girls, i feel like if he wants to work things out we both need to stop talking to other ppl or maybe i'm wrong?
A
female
reader, HonningKanin  +, writes (7 July 2008):
 I think he does care and pretty clear. I think that is a very big sign that he wants you around him and is trying to get into your good graces. Question is... Do you want him? Or are you more content as friends?In the end you are going to just have to ask him flat out what he wants.
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A
female
reader, Yessi13 +, writes (7 July 2008):
Yessi13 is verified as being by the original poster of the questionthanx for the respond but do you think he's really trying to work things out if he's calling me and having me sleep over his house and doing stuff for me? i'm just soo confused!
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A
female
reader, HonningKanin +, writes (7 July 2008):
OK. Everyone has a right to both male and female friends. There is absolutely nothing wrong with him talking to other girls especially if you guys are not an item. Even if you were I think you would still have a problem with him talking to other girls and I can tell you that thinking that way is just going to make you paranoid and jealous and will drive you into a situation where you guys will still be over small things because you wont know how to vent your feelings.
You have already talked to him about these other girls and he says they are friends. You should drop it and leave it at that. Ask to be introduced. Get to know his friends as you would have him know your friends. Dont make this an issue when it doesn't have to be and dont forget to keep talking to him about how you feel and whats on your mind. Men aren't mind readers( One could only wish) and need to be told whats going on inside our heads.
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A
female
reader, starfairy  +, writes (6 July 2008):
 Whether you are together or not, there's no harm in him talking to females, if that's all it is?
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