A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Dear agony aunts...something strange happened today. My ex, who is a computer tech, told me to install a program in my computer, wich alows him to access it, whenever i have any kind of trouble.at first, i thought it was ok, beause i'm always asking for his help with my computer...i don't really understand this stuff, but i have to give him a password to access my pc. The thing is, he told me to add his computer on a "no supervision access", and looking it up on the internet, i found out it grants him total access to my computer, and he doesn't even need my permission!what does this mean?we broke up 3 months ago, it was kinda mutual, but we still have feelings for each other... we were together for 5 years and we were arguing a lot... it wasn't working out... anyway, is he trying to spy on my life?
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male
reader, anonymous, writes (20 August 2011): It actually may not be that creepy depending on what the settings of the program are. You obviously don't know enough about this to know if he's going to spy. I've done the same thing with my father in law but I ask him to start the VNC server while I'm on the phone with him. Then I get to work. Once I'm done, I shut his server off and return everything to normal.
If he wants to spy, he won't shut the server down. Which, in terms of IT, puts your computer at risk. But then who cares about that if you intend to spy?
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