A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:Hey. I just phoned my dad as he had been out drinking last night then he told me 12:00 the NEXT afternoon that he had spent the night in the HOSPITAL! he had had an accident on his bike being a for-kakin wast-anka and not staying at his mates like i had told him to. When i asked why he hadnt told me sooner he just said what would be the point. My dad didnt even care that it could have upset me should i just ignore him or tell him straight how mad i am. Reply to this Question
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reader, anonymous, writes (19 September 2008): It sounds like you are very upset with your Dad. And I know it's becuase you care and that you love him. Has he done rather juvenile things like this before, where you feel that you need to admonish him in order to protect him? There are a lot of parents who behave in a child-like way, turning to the adult child who feels they have to act as a parenting figure. Your father is an older, male adult. And yes, I know you care about him but you need to just stop parenting him. Is there another 'equal' adult female in your Dad's life, such as a wife, a girlfriend, your Mother?
Treating your father like he's a child is coming at the expense of having normal father-daughter interaction and causing a lack of a healthy emotional bond. Because I am sensing you do not respect him for his behaviors, and that you may resent this role in his life. How sad for you and this is not your fault. He needs to be stronger, more dependable and re-connect to you as a strong, fatherly, protective way. Not you, doing this for him. You might have to refuse to parent him anymore, as it's casing you stress. As is suggested below by Babyduck,can you talk to him about this? I would certainly do that so you can live your life, without the added worry of parenting a parent, here. That's not your job. Good luck and take care, hun
A
reader, anonymous, writes (19 September 2008): what dose for-kakin wast-anka mean
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A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (19 September 2008): I found out he wasnt on his bike at the time he was leaving and tripped over the bike thats when part of the fence sliced his neck he has 5 stiches. But im still abit mad that he didnt stay at his mates
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