| A
female
,
anonymous
writes: Hya, i really hope that you can put my mind at ease about something i found out this evening that's got me very confused. My brother loves teasing and tormenting me, he's forever playing jokes on me and ever since our teens-we're both in our 20's now-he's tickled me on a regular basis. I've never really given it much thought but tonight, while he's at his friends, i was having a clear out and found a load of magazines and dvds in his bedroom with women being tickled. At first i was shocked, there was hardly any nudity in them, most of them seemed to have clothed women being tickled on their feet, and that's what's really thrown me, 9 times out of 10 he tickles mine. There was also a few letters from a couple he's met somewhere mentioning me, he's obviously been discussing me because they kept going on about him setting me up for them to tickle. I haven't a clue how to tackle the situation, to be honest i just feel shocked and dazed, any idea what the best course of action is?
View related questions:
teasing Reply to this Question
Share |
Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, Littleboss  +, writes (6 November 2011):
I HAVE a tickle fetish. I also have a brother who tickles me.My brother tickles me a lot and I tickle him, but that doesn't mean I'm getting turned on by it. It's just us having fun. Just because someone has a tickle fetish doesn't mean they get turned on by tickling/being tickled every time or by every one.Think about this... a person can get turned on by kissing, but that doesn't mean they get turned on by kissing their mom or dad, or friend. See?The best thing to do is to ASK him and if it makes you uncomfortable, say so.
A
male
reader, paszkowt  +, writes (15 July 2010):
Define your borders. Now you know it's sexual for him. It's like you'd catch him peeping on you. If it's OK with you that he does a sexual thing with you, everything is fine. If you don't feel good, you have to confront him. Tell him you know it's sexual for him and you don't want to be a sex object for him.As for the discussion about you with others - it might be just a fantasy from both sides involved - your brother shared some tickling stories with them and they fantasiesed about tickling you toghether. Probably nothing real, but again - it's sexualizing you.
...............................
A
reader, anonymous, writes (29 April 2009): Hi, it is important to understand that your brother has a fetish that he has not owned yet. Has he tickled your girlfriends feet when around. Have some ticklish girlfriends come over and hang their barefeet over the couch and see if he engages. It might be good to sit with him and say hey you have a different fetish and need to find honest ways to explore it. Sadly only some women are cool and receptive and most guys with this fetish have no idea how they got it. Kind of like someone who is genetically gay. Many of them feel compulsion towards it like and addict and it gets a sexual flow going for them. He is working it out on you as your sis and it might be good of you can talk to him, not embarass him but say hey, you need to take this to a better place to act out. Maybe ask some of your girlfriends if they would act it out for him and give him some lovin. Maybe set up 10 of your girlfriends to come over and have a ticklefight with him and tell him you will do it again of he agrees not to tickle you. Help him see the healthy boundary and recognize you want to help him but also keep your own boundary in place as siblings. Being a tickle fetishist is more isolating than being gay. Be compassionate, honest, and allow him to open up with you. If he gets confidence maybe he can bring it into normal relationships with him and be open about it, therefore accountable.
...............................
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (31 March 2008): I think your brother really has a tickling fetish, especially for women's feet. I think he gets sexually aroused from tickling your feet and watching you laugh and squirm and telling him to stop. Have you ever noticed if he gets a bulge in his pants when he's tickling you? I say try tickling him back. If that doesn't work, try grabbing his crotch, right where his testicles are and squeezing hard. That will hurt so much he will stop tickling you immediately because the testicles are so sensitive that any kind of pressure there will hurt a guy.
...............................
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (20 March 2007): You need to tell him, if not to stop, then, eliminate you from any planning or involving others. I can see the occasional, playful side-poking or maybe tummy tickle, as I have done so to my older sister, however, have never involved anyone else, certainly don't imbibe in the materials your brother has, and, most importantly, know when to stop. A little physicality in fun is normal and helps build a great relationship. If you don't like it, though, it's in your power to stop it.
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (4 January 2007): Thanks a lot for the replies. moving out isn't an option, i'm actually living at his place and can't afford to leave. I know i'm a wuss but i can't pluck up the nerve to bring it out in the open with him like some of you suggested. I've tried wearing shoes indoors like you said dean but he just yanks them off my feet, i've even tried telling him how ticklish it gets after a few minutes but he just says i laugh enough so it can't be that bad.
...............................
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (1 January 2007): hi there, to be honest with you I think your brother needs help. I'm a tickling manic but I'd NEVER tickle a family member because I get turned on myself when I tickle a girls/womens feet. So there no dout that its turning him on and that he's getting off to it, which to me is pertty damn wrong and quite disturbing! your his sister, for pete sake, tell him to pack it in or tell ya mam or dad. if that dont work try moving to your own place, and when ever you see your brother make sure you have boots or shoes firmly on your feet. And try not letting him see your barefeet if possible, cos that will only make him want to tickle them more. if you want to talk to me about it or some more advice or even let me know how you got on then feel free to e mail me on [email address blocked]
good luck sorting it out, and hope to hear from you soon
take care, Deano xx
...............................
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (26 November 2006): His having a tickling fetish isn't a problem, getting gratification from tickling you is though, especially if he's involving others in it. The next time he starts tickling your feet tell him firmly to stop, if he ignores you try to embarrass him. Ask him why he's doing it, suggest he does it to his girlfriend if he has one, if he hasn't got one tell him it's about time he found one so you can get a break from his tickling. Hopefully he'll feel awkward and take the hint!
...............................
A
female
reader, shania  +, writes (21 October 2006):
 Your brother gets turned on by tickling women because the mags and the dvd's prove this without a doubt.Whats really unhealthy and odd is the fact that he wants to do this with you,of course you were not aware at the time but now you know,you must tell him to stop.Your his sister and its not acceptable for him to keep tickling you.If he keeps doing it then tell him that you know about the mags etc and its making you feel physically sick,hopefully,that should do it.
...............................
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (21 October 2006): You must make it absolutely clear to your brother that he never is to tickle you again. Let him know what you intend to do if he does tickle you again (obviously this must be something that you can and will do). Why? Well, from what you've written, his tickling you is far beyond being anything innocent or normal. Personally, I'd hire some goons to "tickle" him until he was laughing so hard that he was crying...and then I'd have them stop the tickling when...and only when they were darn good and ready.
...............................
|
