A
female
age
36-40,
*ubblygirl
writes:I need opinions on this situation! I am so confused!I have been with my boyfriend now for 5 months. He is a sweet guy who calls me everyday, tells me he loves me and trys to see me as often as possible.However, he goes to the bar almost every weekend; either with or without me, and is a social smoker. I cannot date a smoker and there was even a time when he came home from the bar after a girl ripped his shirt open. I am losing my patience and even though I feel strongly for him, these things are getting in the way and Im not sure what to do anymore! Help!!(I also asked him to stop smoking and try to spend more time other places instead of the bar but he still goes out and hides the smoking now)
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female
reader, star_crossd  +, writes (11 January 2010):
speaking as a smoker it would not be wise to ask him to choose between you and an addiction because he will choose you to your face and continue to smoke behind your back. you need to help him quit and get him to try new things so he doesn't miss the bar or accept that he is what he is and won't change.
A
female
reader, thickness  +, writes (11 January 2010):
 Im n the same situation your n. I think the best thing u can do is sit down n talk to him again about the smoking issue. If u find it really hard to still date him, then u should let him go. Give him a choice: either u or the smoking. If he chooses smoking, then that would tell u how he truly feels about u.
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