A
female
age
51-59,
anonymous
writes:my boyfriend of four months is perfect in every way, but he hardly ever calls me.most of the time i have to contact him to make arrangements and he is always very happy to meet me.he says he is just not good at phoning people and even worse at texting or e-mailing.if i don't call him for a few days when i eventually do he begs me to never punish him like that again.sometimes i feel the only way foward is dumping him but i love him like i've never loved anyone before.
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male
reader, Dr T  +, writes (29 September 2007):
youre going to dump him because he doesnt phone?
If thats the case the whole bloody species would have disappeared long ago! AG Bell didnt save mankind from extinction he invented a new form of communication.
This is what this guy is like, doesnt like phones.
Good guy in all other respects yes? Then you be the one to call, simple solution
A
male
reader, anonymous, writes (27 September 2007):
Some people find telephoning to be invigorating and they enjoy it. Others find it an energy drain. Not that they cant do it, but non-visual communication requires at lot of attention from them.
Your bf might be like this. I know I only phone if I feel obligated to- that in work personal relationship etc.
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A
reader, anonymous, writes (27 September 2007): I totally agree with Leanne.
Perhaps you should instruct him in the art of text messaging. If he's anything like my other half, anything with buttons on it might just as well be a strange scientific gadget from an alien spaceship!
If he's not good at emailing, perhaps he's worried about correct spelling or is computer illiterate?
Phil
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A
female
reader, leanne.od +, writes (27 September 2007):
 i understand your frustration but then i understand where he is coming from because i hate phoning anyone - even my own family!
perhaps you need to explain that it shouldn't always been down to you to make the contact, set up a message he can send, all he needs to do is re-arrange the times or something.
he's obviously into you so don't end things because of his lack of contact, at least he is interested in you.
there are solutions to any problem - it's finding them that prove difficult. you need to find mutual ground where he tries to show more of an input.
you'll work it out.
take care
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