A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:My boyfriend is in the air force and lately I just don't feel happy. I feel stressed and I miss him and life just sucks here with out him. When ever we talk this last week it just seems like there is something that always goes wrong and it gets between us and we both get down. But I feel it usually happens because I start saying that I am missing something that I need from him and then he gets down with me because he don't know what to do. I already know we have decided on long distance to make this work but it is still hard. I have no idea to stop letting my own negative and worries get between us but i keep feeling i need something more from him when we talk. I dont know how to make this feeling go away i love him so much and i just want us to work. i alreayd know its because of the distance we have done LD before but this feeling just sucks
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female
reader, tennisstar88 +, writes (24 February 2011):
Even when you two get married, (it is great)you will back to that whole LDR deal when he gets deployed. Don't hold me to this, but I think Air Force only get deployed for 6 months. However, they do have support groups on base for the military wives..plus by then you should have learned how to occupy your time wisely.
Being a military wife is a tough job, but it's got rewards. Such as your man looks superb in a uniform. :)
A
female
reader, anonymous, writes (16 February 2011): Well..he is in tech school right now in MS( im in CA) and he left for basic in nov. I went to his graduation first week of Jan. so it really has not even been that long since the last time we saw each other. It is not really fights i guess just more of over thinking about the bad( and the missing) rather than the good and everything weve been through together. because WE KNEW it would be hard and we both still love each other and want to be with each other.(two yrs this yr) we did do long distance for a job too for about 4 months.. and yes we are planning on getting married and having a future together...he has a 6 yr contract and thinking of maybe doing another 4..so that's still up in the air if he wants to do more time
Your post got me more thinking about reality and whats actually going on with me so thanks...I think it just feels worse because things at home with family life school...its just not the greatest the last week so i guess missing him was just all that much harder.BUT i know that i have to just get through the storm...sometimes its harder than others so thanks.
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A
female
reader, tennisstar88 +, writes (16 February 2011):
LDRs are hard in general, throw in a military relationship that's makes it even worse. Also, they're not for everyone.
There's nothing you can do about the distance. How long has he been gone now?
Of course you're going to miss him, and these fights (i bet they're petty arguments) are because you guys are apart as well. Sure it sucks without him, but life goes on. Keep in mind that you are choosing to date a guy that is in the military. It's hard and you will be in a LDR for quite a while. Do you guys have any plans for marriage? LDRs come with a high level of commitment. You two couldn't just move in together down there, without being married. How long does he plan on staying in?
How far away are you from where he is stationed? You could take road trips and go visit him, he can also come see you on the weekends(if he has them off). For now you're going have to take what you can get which is video chats and talking on the phone.
To take your mind off of the distance, you can take extra course hours at school, maybe overtime at work, surround yourself with family and friends. Learn to occupy your time wisely, that way you'll spend less time thinking about how much this LDR sucks. Remember you agreed to this LDR, you can buck up and make this work.
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