A
female
age
26-29,
*ru_2_oja
writes:age 34... Shit!! now my boyfriend of three years ias depressed and just says f#+"* it! and i know he means it. hes angry at me for pushing him away in our relationship(no communication skills. we were stuck.) he hates his job. hes talking about trucking. Noooo! now i feel bad. i still love him, but so many combative probs. im a mum of three. none r his. own my home. he lives alone in his own home. just couldnt c living together. ok... but i love him. i feel guilty for his depression! please reply..... how can i help him? how can i get this relationship roling?
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female
reader, Laura1318  +, writes (1 April 2010):
 Men fall in love at first sight.They quickly fall out of love when they don't get what they want.
A
female
reader, tru_2_oja +, writes (1 April 2010):
tru_2_oja is verified as being by the original poster of the questionthank you so much for replying. yea.. i feel guilty for his depression because i was pulling away big time when i finally saw after three years we wasn't going to change his ways. then when he noticed that i was falling out of love with him he suddenly started trying. he was so sweet it freaked of out. i wasn't falling for it. finally he just said Fuck it. and drank stayed to himself. i feel bad. but anyway why do men fall out of love so fast? how can they love u so much one day then the next ur like, what the fuck.?
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A
female
reader, Tisha-1 +, writes (1 April 2010):
 Why do you feel guilty for his depression? This is something inside him that is causing it. You're not the cause, nor will you be the cure. The cure has to come from inside himself, with the help of his doctor and a rounded, well-balanced approach to life, nutrition and exercise.
You can be a support, a help, a cheerleader and sidekick.
Communication skills, right, there are books and books written on how to improve couples' communications, shelves of them on library and book store shelves. On line discussions of fighting fair and how to listen to one another. You can start looking for those and encourage him to join you.
Don't beat yourself up if you are willing to go on this journey and he's reluctant to come along. It's not your fault, it's the depression holding him back. If you can, have patience, be loving, but don't allow yourself to get dragged down into the pit with him. You're not going to be the one who saves him. He has to save himself. Hopefully, he'll realize this and start taking action.
Remember, you already have 3 children you are caring for; you don't need to add him as a fourth. So model the behavior you'd like to see in him; that means you learn to listen and talk to him, you stop this combative thing you're doing and find a counselor if you have to. Even if he doesn't go, you can too. You stay healthy, you stop drinking too much (if you are), stop smoking (if you are), move your body, eat right, fill your days with positive things.
You can start today. Even if he's not there in the first part of this, your attitude and your success may get through to him, so he goes and gets the help he needs.
Good luck.
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A
female
reader, Laura1318 +, writes (1 April 2010):
He needs to see a GP and take those anti depression drugs.He is sick and only those medicine will help him.
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