A
female
age
30-35,
anonymous
writes:My boyfriend has a high sex drive and i dont, which makes it hard to want sex as often as he does. Im an very emotionally and physically attracted to him, but somedays i just dont feel like having sex, as to him he wants to have sex at least once or twice a day. When we dont have sex he feels sad or depressed and assumes its because im not as attracted to him as he is me. Lately i have been feeling bad about it, so id wake him up or ask him for sex when hes not expecting it. but now he thinks we can ONLY have sex when i say so because i denied it when he attempted to. I love my boyfriend and i do want to have sex with him and i do enough it but idk why im so reluctant sometimes. Hes starting to think im not attracted to him. What do i do?
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
female
reader, YouWish +, writes (30 January 2012):
 Your boyfriend is an insecure tool. Sex isn't all about his drive. Once or twice per day is a lot, and yes, the relationship isn't just about the sex!
You've woken him up to have sex, and he's making it an issue that he can have sex when you say? He must not have had many relationships, because usually the person with the lower sex drive is the one that usually gets asked constantly. It's not a power or a "less attracted" thing. It's simply that a compromise must be reached. The two of you must meet halfway without any guilt trips.
Either that, or if he's still going to be this immature about it, he should find the rare woman who wants sex 3 times per day to feel more compatible.
A
male
reader, TrancedRhythmEar  +, writes (30 January 2012):
 Reassure him youre attracted to him but do not have as high a sex drive as him. Compromise perhaps with oral? Or dates or some other activity together.
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