A
female
age
41-50,
anonymous
writes:I've been dating a man for more than 2.5 years, but have known him for more than 3 years. I met him when I was 25 years old, a week or so after I got laid off from my prevous employer. He's 1.5 years younger than me, and was 23 at the time, turning 24 the following month. While we have a great relationship, the biggest problem lies in this situation: he works in one state, but likes to visit his friends and family in another state, 90 miles away, almost every weekend (as it seems in the summer) or several times a month, in the winter. He has no friends in the state I live in, and claims that he wants to spend time with his mom, dad, sisters, and good friends from high school there. While I can go with him every so often, I have my own life, with my own friends and family here. Most of the time I feel like we're living parallel lives. I don't know how to change the situation, other than to leave him. I want someone who can spend more time with me, especially on the weekends. What do you think of this? Reply to this Question
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Fancy yourself as an agony aunt? Add your answer to this question! A
male
reader, Danielepew  +, writes (2 July 2007):
 I think I would need more information on this one.
It seems to me that your only reason to complain is his leaving the state. Do you feel neglected? How good is your relationship with him, if you leave out his frequent trips? Does he seem reluctant to take you with him? How much time do you spend together?
Maybe he has a legitimate reason to leave every weekend, but, anyways, perhaps he should spend more time with you. Like 50-50, maybe. If he doesn't, well, you may have grounds to complain and to think about leaving him.
Can you elaborate on this?
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