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My boyfriend has suddenly gone crazy over my male friend being at the party with me and now he is ignoring me! What should I do?

Tagged as: Troubled relationships, Trust issues<< Previous question   Next question >>
Question - (20 February 2012) 6 Answers - (Newest, 20 February 2012)
A female United States age 36-40, anonymous writes:

My boyfriend and I have been dating for over 2 and half years. And I love him more than words can say. He has the potential to be an amazing partner, friend, lover, etc. But, he has put me through a lot in a short amount of time. Everything from cheating, disappearing, leaving me alone in a crisis, etc. We have broken up twice (I was the one that called it off both times). I feel a little stupid sometimes for staying with him because of everything that happened but at the end of the day I really do love him.

This past Saturday was my birthday and he was wonderful. We spent Friday thru Saturday afternoon together and he had all sorts of things planned. Saturday night I was going out with my friends to dinner and to a Mardi Gras masquerade party. He decided not to go when I told him of what I was planning which was fine, it really wasn't his scene anyway. I ended up running into my cousin (my male cousin) which was awesome and my boyfriend's best friend. I introduced everyone and continued to party. I invited a lot of my friends but just two of my best girl friends showed up and one of my best guy friends (all of whom my boyfriend has met several times). I told him all about it and even called him and every juncture (he didn't answer my calls).

This morning he calls at 2:33 in the morning, and asks me who was with me. I told me my girlfriends, my one guy friend, and my cousin and his friends. He got this attitude because my one guy friend was there. I can't understand what the issue is. I have NEVER given him a reason to not trust me in anyway. I told everything as I knew it, I put out the invite and up until 8pm that night just the girls were coming then when we got to dinner my guy friend called and said he was near the restaurant and stopped by. I called my bf but didn't answer. I called him again when we got to the club, and again when we left. He hung up on me twice and I wasn't able to sleep for hours after. And now he is ignoring me. I don't know what to do? I just think this is crazy. Seriously.

View related questions: best friend, cousin

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A male reader, Sageoldguy1465 United States +, writes (20 February 2012):

Sageoldguy1465 agony auntYou call it "crazy"... I call it "childish"....

Tell Mr Wonderful that you aren't prepared to continue dating a 5 year old..... and dump him and look for someone who is mentally and emotionally closer to your age...

Good luck...

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A female reader, Miamine United Kingdom +, writes (20 February 2012):

Miamine agony aunt"And I love him more than words can say" (anonymous female 26-29)

1. He cheats on you

2. He disappears and you can't find him

3. He is no help in a crisis, he can't support you

4. You've had to leave him twice because he treated you bad

5. He doesn't answer the phone when you ring

6. You have to with a male cousin cause your man is missing

7. You have to be with friends on your birthday cause he can't be bothered to make you happy on your special day

8. He wakes you up at all hours, doesn't care if he wakes you up

9. He's got jealousy and control issues

10. He hangs up the phone on you like a 5year old child having a tantrum when you've done nothing wrong.

11. Now he's ignoring you even though he's the one in the wrong.

You can't sleep, your upset, you think the situation is crazy... but ...... "I feel a little stupid sometimes for staying with him because of everything that happened but at the end of the day I really do love him."

What do you want us to do. You love him, you don't want leave him, your willing to put up with anything in the hope one day some magic fairy will make him into the man of your dreams. Seriously, we can see the problem, but what question are you asking?

You don't know what to do.. but we could tell you... When he hurts you a little more and your tired of feeling stupid, abused and used, we can discuss the issue of dumping and leaving... until then... you choose to stay with this useless excuse of a man.

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A female reader, eyeswideopen United States +, writes (20 February 2012):

eyeswideopen agony auntMaybe you see his great potential but it sure eludes me. I think he sounds like he's around 13 to tell the truth. He hangs up and then ignores you? The only potential I see here is for a very tiresome life with this guy. Tell him to look you up if and when he matures.

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A female reader, crummyscreenname Canada +, writes (20 February 2012):

break up with him and stay broken up, he's obviously a waste of your time.

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A male reader, TrancedRhythmEar Saudi Arabia +, writes (20 February 2012):

TrancedRhythmEar agony auntTrust. Any reason why he shouldnt trust you?

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A male reader, anonymous, writes (20 February 2012):

Sounds like your boyfriend may be a cheater. I would be looking more at if he is someone you can really trust because guys usually act like this when they are guilty.

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